Brandon Hollis

8 Years and Counting

2010-06-23T18:08:00.002-05:00

Yesterday my wife & I celebrated our eighth anniversary. Crazy how time flies when you're having fun! :-) But I'm so glad I married the woman I did, and here's a few reasons why:

1) She is beautiful. Not just the "super gorgeous" kind of beautiful, cuz she is, but I mean TRULY beautiful. Her insides match her outsides. She is compassionate, caring, honest, intuitive, lovably stubborn, and willing to sacrifice for the greater good. Her love for God is reflected in the way she lives and how she treats others; it's not just something that she talks about.

2) She is real. She doesn't sugar-coat the truth, which I so appreciate (except for the times she calls me on the carpet, which has only happened like once...ha!). She shoots straight and calls it how she sees it, simplifying the process of getting to the heart of the matter, whatever it may be.

3) She is funny. Seriously, she cracks me up all the time. Even when I wish she would stop the incessant sarcasm, somehow she turns it around on itself to make me laugh yet again (which is irritating when I'm really trying to be mad). God knew I needed someone who would balance my sometimes-too-serious outlook on life!

4) She is committed. Even when we're at odds, I know she's not thinking about walking out on me. We have had our share of knock-down, drag-out fights through the years, but we have learned to fight fair, to make amends as soon as possible, and to learn from each altercation (which are usually her fault anyhow...ha ha...yeah right!).

5) She is strong. Every time I play Mr. Mom and handle the kids on my own, I am amazed by what my wife does as a mother, as well as a wife! Truth is I couldn't do what she does, and I know it. She is gifted in ways that I am not, and I'm evermore grateful that she is mine with each passing day.

If you haven't told the one you love WHY you love them so much...remind them--and yourself.

The Unnatural Phenomenon of Rest

2010-05-31T10:41:00.003-05:00

The title says it all...my question is WHY? I'm on the second week of vacation with my family in Myrtle Beach, having a killer time, but it took me nearly the whole first week to decompress and begin to truly relax. As I ask myself why my mind's button is literally stuck in the "ON" position, why I brought work with me on a trip intended to escape from it temporarily, I'm reminded of Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

I've got issues, I know...that's step one, right? Admitting the problem? :-) Among them is the weakness of my work ethic, but not in the sense that one might assume. Every job I've ever had, from lawn care to janitor to teaching to waiter to construction to milk man to ministry, I have given 100%...and I always will. It's part of my nature, it's the way I was raised, it's the way I believe God intends us to live. My weakness lies not in my labor, but in my rest. I have never prioritized quality, healthy rest the way I should, and I see it more clearly now than ever because it has grown in necessity as my life has grown in complexity. And I think that rest is part of one's work ethic, because it directly affects the capacity and quality of work that one is capable of!

For me, rest is unnatural. Escape is natural, but not rest...and there's a difference. I can watch a good movie and manage to escape reality for a few hours, but I don't necessarily find rest. I can go on a 10-minute motorcycle ride and actually find more rest in it than I do a two-hour nap. The answer is not directly related to gasoline and horsepower, although that never hurts (wink), but rather that every time I get on my motorcycle, I find my mind connecting with God as my senses experience the wonder and beauty of His creation, reminding me (again) of how great He is, and how great He thinks I am because He made all of this for my enjoyment.

"Come to Me...and I will give you rest." Once again, He is the answer...always has been and always will be. It is when I come to Him that I truly find rest for my soul, renewal for my mind, passion in my heart, fuel for my body. I'm committing (again) to come to Him for rest, to do the things that connect me with Him more regularly. I'm reminded of a teaching I once heard about the story of creation, and how "the evening and the morning were the first day" (Gen. 1:5). Notice that the evening is listed FIRST, which represents rest. God set it up for us to operate from a place of rest and restoration, so we should do our part in finding that place every day!

If rest is unnatural for you as it is for me, let's change it! That's not what God intended, and it's not what we should settle for...

Heartbeat

2010-03-30T16:01:00.003-05:00

Ya know those moments when time stands still and you find yourself thinking about life in a different way? I've had two of those moments within the past 24 hours.

Last night I had to drive home and grab my trumpet cuz I realized I had forgotten to bring it with me for lessons. I had a 10-minute window, so I left the car running, ran inside, ran out, jumped in and took off. Upon reaching the intersection that I just came through, a half mile down the road from our subdivision, I was among the first people to stop at a horrific accident. There was a mangled pickup flipped in the ditch, with the driver still strapped in his seatbelt hanging upside down. In the opposing lane was a compact sedan that had been slammed by the truck to the point that you could not tell what kind of car it was.

I got out to see if I could be of any assistance, and on first glance, I thought the woman driving the car was dead. Then I noticed that she was breathing, though slumped over and unresponsive, and went to check on the driver of the truck, who seemed fine. A few minutes later, I left to get out of the way of emergency vehicles as they arrived. Three hours later on my way home, the intersection was still closed as the accident was being investigated.

I kept thinking to myself, "I was at that exact spot in a moment of time not more than 60 seconds prior that happening." And as I earnestly prayed for the people involved, I was also grateful that it wasn't me. I realized again how precious and fragile life really is.

Today I met my wife at her OB appointment, and had another moment. The doc pulled out the little ultrasound dealy and moved it around on her belly until he found it...the heartbeat of our third child. There's something about that sound that makes everything else inside of you shut up and listen. The sound of new life being knit together, vivacious and tenacious...what a beautiful sound! Makes me tear up right now thinking about it; makes me wanna be the father my children deserve all over again. At what point do some of us stop living, when we all started out so determined and unstoppable?

Life is a gift. Every heartbeat, every minute, every memory. May we never take for granted this precious gift; may we make the most of all of it--the good, the bad, and the ugly. We won't pass this way twice, only once. Let's live while we're here baby! "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." --Jesus

Redefining Success

2010-03-22T13:54:00.007-05:00

I just finished reading a great book for the second time, and I highly recommend it...it's called "The Traveler's Gift" by Andy Andrews. It changed the way I think about life both times I read it, and I handed it off to another friend yesterday to help him in his journey, because it's helped me so much in mine.

Some things are genetic, some things are learned, but the only things that are permanent are the things we choose to believe. For far too long, I've believed something about my life that, until now, I have been unable to identify as false, even ridiculous. There has been an underlying feeling of failure within myself that ebbs and flows, but never subsides. No matter how much I accomplish or succeed at certain aspects of life, I don't feel like a success. Why?

Even within the context of spirituality, having established a connection with the divine as a child and walking in close relationship with God throughout my life thus far, why do I feel this way? When I know I am loved unconditionally despite my faults and failures, and there is no need to prove anything to Him, why do I feel the need to prove so much to myself?

I am finally learning to love myself more truly. It's funny...I've always seen the best in people, and never had that much trouble loving them, but I've had a heck of a time loving me. Somehow I haven't measured up to all the high expectations that I established for myself many years ago (maybe because some of my expectations are a little crazy). The love of God is unconditional, so if His love is in me, why am I conditional with myself? It's funny how you can be gracious with others, while withholding grace from yourself.

For much of my life, I've allowed my financial prowess (or lack thereof :-) to dominate my feelings of success. While part of that is innate as a man, much of it is tied to the "American dream," and the culture we live in. But I work for a church, and I'm a musician...that's two strikes right there! Ha! But in all seriousness, I am fed up with the tide of worry and fear that has washed up discouragement and despair on the shores of my cerebral cortex!! As a Christ follower, I know that something's wrong when my decisions are being guided more by fear than by faith.

So what is "success?" I think it's much more tied to who you are than what you do. Even if you DO a lot, that in itself does not make you successful. If I had accomplished all my big dreams, but died without ever loving myself simply and completely, I missed the mark! And as I write this, I wonder if I'm writing these words as a cop out because I haven't attained the Everest-esque peaks that I had hoped to reach by now...but for me, I can honestly say no. Because even if I was that high, I'd still be searching for what I've found "down" here.

Simply put, I am enough. I am married to an all-around beautiful woman, who I love more today than ever before. I have two awesome little boys, and another bun in the oven (due in September...woo hoo!). I am following a bigger plan for my life than I made for myself (not bigger in the vein of how I used to think, but bigger because it's not mine...wink). I get to do what I love for a living alongside other people who truly love me for me. I have true friends, who will be friends for a lifetime.

Money is nice. Accomplishment feels good. But living in faith, hope, and most of all, love...that is success!

Fascination

2010-03-16T22:44:00.003-05:00

A clip from a great article below...makes you wonder if you're the type of person who brings people closer to God, or drives them further away!

"The more I have read the Bible and studied the life of Jesus, the more I have become convinced that Christianity spreads best not through force but through fascination. But over the past few decades our Christianity, at least here in the United States, has become less and less fascinating. We have given the atheists less and less to disbelieve. And the sort of Christianity many of us have seen on TV and heard on the radio looks less and less like Jesus"

Real Life Puppets?

2010-03-09T10:45:00.002-06:00

I was part of a small group recently that read "The Shack" together (which is a MUST read if you haven't read it!), and we had a great discussion about predestination. I've found myself thinking about it more and more as of late. Basically there are two views on this:

1) Calvinist - believe that everything that we experience in life was decided beforehand by God to come to pass, and we pretty much have no power over it. Certain people are appointed for salvation, while others are destined for damnation.

2) Arminian - believe that humanity is empowered with free will and we each choose the path we will take. Salvation is available to any and all who will receive it, and God's will is "conditional" based on the choices we make.

Our discussion focused around whether or not the choices we make in life are already written in God's "manual" for our lives. Are we just puppets, oblivious to the marionette strings attached, mistakenly convinced of our own independence; or are we actually able to exercise a power of choice that can truly alter and decide the course of our lives?

I am definitely more of an Arminian, believing in free will and the God-bestowed power within us to decide our own destiny (side note: a member of our group said, "All worship leaders are Arminian!" --can you say stereotype? :-). I have considered the possibility, however, of God's absolute foreknowledge, and how that relates to predestination. Maybe we're not predestined for certain things, but God knows exactly what will transpire before it actually happens. When God confronted the apostle Paul on the road to Damascus, afflicting him with blindness, do you think He knew that he would eventually change his life and become one of the most influential leaders of the Christian church? I do.

When I think about times in my life when I have felt forgotten or ignored by God, even victimized by circumstances that I did not choose, I can see in hindsight how those moments have become turning points, milestones, proving grounds that have forever impacted my life. I've changed my thinking from "thank God I'm not there anymore" to "thank God I WAS THERE." At the end of the day, the answer to the question of whether God is the supreme puppetmaster over humanity doesn't wreck my faith...because more than anything, He is LOVE. If I am just a marionette doing His dance, I'm just glad it doesn't feel that way.

Vantage Point

2010-01-27T23:19:00.004-06:00

OK, so going on a Bahamas cruise in January when you call Kansas home is a beautiful thing! Although coming back to said home involves a considerable degree of anguish, it's worth the pain. We went from 75 degrees in shorts and flip flops to 29 degrees with "make you feel naked" wind...ouch. But the preview of what spring and summer have to offer was nice!

Just a couple thoughts to share. It had been cloudy all week before we left town last Friday. Not just the few puffy clouds in the sky kind of cloudy, but the "I don't even know if there is still a sun" kind of cloudy. The kind where after a few days, you start to realize that it's affecting your mood rather strongly, especially when you find yourself staring at screen savers of sunsets and the like.

So we got on the plane at 6:25 Friday morning. It's just before dawn, but darker than normal because it's still cloudy. As the plane takes off, I'm watching my 4-year-old peer out the cabin window, enjoying how he gets a kick out of how fast we're going as the trees below shrink into shrubs. It's not long before we're reaching the layer of clouds that have shrouded the Midwest like a dirty blanket all week, and within seconds we're poking out the other side. As we do, I catch the first glimpse of the sun rising in the east.

A simple moment in time, but a small voice inside said, "The sun still shines even when you can't see it." Though hidden from view, it's still there. It is faithful to rise and shine throughout every waking moment of the day (and night), regardless of my ability to see its light or feel its warmth. Too often, I allow my vantage point on earth to dictate how I think about the things I don't see, and as such, I limit myself to the visible, predictable, mediocre. God is none of those things, so why do I allow myself to think that way? Why do I let the immediate overrule the eternal?

The sun still shines even you can't see it. Change your vantage point. See beyond what you can see. Because when you decide to change, everything changes for you.

Fragile not Forgotten

2009-07-20T21:42:00.002-05:00

The first week of June, I took a three-day "Wild Hogs" motorcycle trip with Pastor Timmy & two other guys to celebrate Timmy's 40th birthday. Yeah, he's officially a gezer...ha! We rode through the Ozark mountains around Eureka Springs and saw a lot of beautiful scenery. A few weeks before that, I camped out with my dad, brother, and 3-year-old son for two nights at the lake. Both excursions were really fun and refreshing--but in deeper ways than I expected!

While we were out camping, I felt something behind my ear and discovered a tick crawling into my hairline. That got us talking about how amazing and disturbing it is that something so small could possibly give you a life-threatening disease like Lyme's, or like malaria from a mosquito! It reminded me of how incredibly fragile we really are. Sometimes we get so used to being the masters of the universe that our human pride whispers invincibility in our own ears, without our even realizing it. It's a subtle shift from gratitude to self-sufficiency that sets us up for confusion and disappointment. I believe it's healthy for us to remind ourselves how small we really are.

Both nights of camping were crystal clear and beautiful, and most of the motorcycle trip was beautiful too--we did get rained on once, which hurt pretty good! Especially while we were out on the bikes, though, I found myself getting lost in the sheer beauty of it all. The contour of the horizon, the colors of the sun set, the layers of vegetation, even the refreshing chill of the rain. When you really look at it, really take time to do nothing else but look at the world we live in, it's amazing! Every time I do, I can't help but insist that this didn't happen by accident; it couldn't have only been a random occurrence at some point in the past 400 million years or whatever.

Then the pieces came together for me. It was this realization (again) that we have been placed on this planet not just to survive, but to thrive, to enjoy the journey, and to bask in each of the moments we are given. We are small but not insignificant. Fragile but not forgotten. As menial as our individual existence can seem as times, it is not. We are all uniquely shaped, designed, and gifted for a specific niche. What an insight into the heart of God that is! The vastness of His ability and creativity, as well as the beauty of His love. I'm again completely baffled at the depth of His goodness, and inspired to love the life He has entrusted to me!

If you're working like a dog, good for you...just make sure you make time to play like a dog too! We were made to LIVE, baby!

The Faith Pendulum

2009-03-28T23:30:00.006-05:00

It's amazing how therapeutic good conversation can be (especially when good food is involved too :-) Doing the lunch thing at On the Border the other day, I found myself confessing to one of my good friends how my own heart seems to lead me astray from time to time. One day, I'm resting in the hands of God, and the next, I'm not sure if God is even real. What's up with that!?!

Why is it that one moment, I'm able to live in a state of confident assurance and peaceful resolve that God is with me, sees my problems, and is ultimately in control...but then the smallest little issue can seemingly derail my entire world!? I find myself asking questions like, "Why does this have to happen to me right now?" and thinking things like, "Man! Every time I really get it together, it seems like some crap has to go wrong! If only (blah blah blah), I could really stay on the right track..."

I read something recently that shot me in the heart (or the butt...maybe both). It was along these lines: When something bad/wrong happens to me, I've learned to stop blaming the event, or asking God why. Instead, I take inventory of what that event stirs inside of me--what emotions I feel, what fingers I want to point, what thoughts I think. Because the truth is, that event did not crawl inside of me and plant those things there...they were already there! They were simply brought to the surface by my circumstance.

As much as I hate to admit that some of those God-blaming, doubt-spewing, self-absorbed tendencies are in me, they are. And I don't like it! I find great solace in the fact, though, that although my faith sometimes swings from extreme confidence to extreme doubt, God continues to be uber-gracious, all-forgiving, and ever-able. It again fills me with hope and awe, and boggles my mind that he can use such a "tool" as me!

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." (Heb 13:8) I know I can count on Him...my prayer is that He can count on me too!

Ebenezer

2008-08-14T16:41:00.003-05:00

For all those who grew up singing hymns in church, you might recall this word from one of the all-time greats. No, it's not the crotchety old man from A Christmas Carol that I'm referring to here (that's who I thought of first too!). It's from the song "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing," and we just sang it for the first time a month or so ago at Mercy Church (the first time ever for me).

Anyhow, there's a line in there that says, "Here I raise my ebenezer, here by Thy great help I've come." I suddenly had a vision of lifting a little Scrooge bobble head toward heaven as I sang those lyrics, and decided at that moment that I had to discover the meaning or else I would burst into laughter when we sang it on Sunday.

So check it out...this is cool. In I Samuel 7, the Israelites are returning to God after serving idols and foreign gods. They go to a place and humble themselves before God with fasting and prayer. Then their arch enemy, the Philistines, decides to come and attack them while they are vulnerable. They cry out to God all the more, and He answers their prayers by "thundering with loud thunder," throwing the Philistines into such a panic that they are defeated by the Israelites. Then the prophet Samuel sets a stone in that place, and names it Ebenezer, meaning "stone of help." Samuel says, "Thus far the Lord has helped us."

I thought that was awesome, mainly because now I could sing the song without laughing! (ha) But I found it very meaningful. I found myself reflecting on all that God has brought me through in my life. Times that I cannot deny His divine assistance in getting through a hard time, providing the means to pay bills that I had no money for, speaking words of comfort when my heart was gripped with fear.

It's those times that I too often forget about when I'm facing a new crisis. Suddenly I'm not quite sure if God's gonna show up and help me get through this, and I start freakin' out 'cause I'm gonna have to go it alone and figure this out for myself! Then I'm more tired and drained than I ought to be, my sleep is not restful, my food doesn't satisfy, and my mind doesn't stop!!

If it sounds like I know what I'm talking about, it's because this summer has been an Ebenezer for me. I'll look back on this summer as a point in my life and in my family where I can say, "Thus far God has helped us." And when we come face to face with the next mountain, I will remember this summer (and all the other times in my life where God was undeniably involved), and I won't allow myself to freak out (hopefully); I won't try to do it on my own. Because I know God is for me, and God is with me.

What are your Ebenezers?

How Long is Your Curve?

2008-06-19T11:28:00.005-05:00

I never fail to amaze myself at how many times I have to learn the same lesson time and again. I mean, come on, I'm a bonafide MAN, 31 years old, married with children, lifetime Christian, ordained minister, yada, yada, yada...

But if I'm honest, I gots me some issues!

When crunch time comes, I'm way too quick to worry and way too slow to trust in God, thrown into a frantic whirlwind of exhausting thought and random action, none of which proves to be fruitful or helpful. Then lo and behold, something comes out of left field and fills the need that I've been wearing myself out trying to figure out all along. And if I'm honest, I'm both thankful for God's provision yet intensely frustrated that I wasn't the ONE to make it happen!!

Then I realize--I've been here before. I've learned this lesson at another place and time, but somehow temporarily forgot the faithfulness and limitless creativity of God. Then I remember where Jesus said to "seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

Simply put, my learning curve's way too long. Once again, I've had to learn to swallow my pride, follow His leading, and rest in the fact that He knows exactly what my needs are, and it's not in His nature to up and leave me...ever!

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (John 6:25-27)

Are You Good Enough?

2008-05-16T11:47:00.003-05:00

Think of all the crap that's happened to you that you didn't deserve. Granted, sometimes we have to pay the consequences for our mistakes, but what about the stuff that comes out of the blue that just sucks?

Going through spiritual detox the past several years has been painfully delightful for me, and I'm finding more and more freedom in the realization that we live in a fallen world, and in the goodness of God. We don't deserve all the bad stuff, and when we need help, the big man's always there to help us make it through.

Along the path of life, there may come challenges, tragedies, and injustices that we in no way have brought on ourselves. Since sin made its entrance in the Garden of Eden, nothing has been the same. Some stuff just doesn't make sense, and it never will in this life.

I also know that despite my best efforts to be "good," I will either fail miserably or come frustratingly close without ever making it all the way. But here's the kicker: God is infinitely good, and He always makes up for my lack. And the sooner I swallow my pride and accept that truth, the better off I am.

So don't blame God, and don't blame yourself. (unless you really did rob that bank :-) Whatever comes, HIS goodness will get you through to the other side.

Centered

2008-05-14T13:23:00.002-05:00

I's just thinkin' about the words to the first song I ever wrote:

"It matters not what people say
It matters not what people may do
For I know, Lord, that you are real
And I know Your word is true

Pressing onward toward the goal
I'll not have to worry, I'll not have to fear

Cuz I'm gonna keep my heart
And I'll keep my mind
Lord I'm gonna keep my life
Centered on You"

I know, I know...not exactly poetry! But after the worship set this Sunday, I felt such awesome peace and comfort inside of myself that I realized again what the key to the good life is all about. And it's all about being "centered" on God, His truth, His purposes, His goodness, His grace...

That's what worship does for me. Helps me get past myself to see how much bigger and better God is than I give Him credit for a lot of the time. Reminds me that it's really not all up to me, no matter how hard I work or how much I try. Paves the way for my worry and fear to be transplanted with faith and hope.

Whatever helps you to center yourself on God, do it...and do it often!

Life Is Now

2008-04-30T11:21:00.003-05:00

I'm busy. Got a lot on my plate. Too much to do and too little time to do it.

Sound familiar? It's easy, even natural, to slide into the stressed-out mode. Ya know, beyond just the busy "good" kind of stress...the place where you're not enjoying life, missing out on the little moments that you'll never get back.

I saw a snapshot of my firstborn son yesterday, and it snapped me back into reality. I was on the verge of tears as I looked at his chubby no-neckness that was a year ago, realizing that he'll never be like that again. Not that I missed out on it; I enjoyed every minute of it, but it made me take inventory of how I'm living now. And if I'm honest, I've been sidetracked when I get home after work, unable to release everything and embrace my family fully.

Yesterday never comes around again. Today is a day like no other. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. So love your life now, and make forever memories everyday.

No More Silent Religion

2008-04-22T12:03:00.005-05:00

Here lately I'd had so many conversations with people about spirituality that I'm realizing for myself what much of our generation seems to crave nowadays...the interactive search for truth. For many, just sitting silently listening to an orator leaves them feeling educated but muddled, in need of conversation to process what they've just heard.

For far too long, the various sectors of the church (denominations we call them--some might call them demonizations...ha!) have clinged to their "version" of truth as THE only way to believe, when in fact, I think it was some guy named Jesus who actually said, "I am the way." Anyhow, I know I don't know it all and I never will. In fact, the more I learn, the more I realize how small and dumb I am in fact!

While I believe in absolute truth, I don't believe in absolute process. Meaning that Christ is what is sacred, not how we get to Him. If the path to faith in Christ is meant to look a certain way, I think the Bible would say so. But again, it was Jesus Himself who said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." (John 14:6)

The church talks a lot. I guess my question is: are we listening too? There are many waiting to be heard without being judged, to be allowed to express their faith, doubts, and fears, and to walk their individual pathway to faith in Christ.

Missing It

2008-04-18T09:32:00.004-05:00

Being raised in an evangelical church, I was programmed to be an evangelist...meaning that I need to be winning souls for Christ everywhere I go, constantly proclaiming the gospel message, even when people don't want to hear it--and that's where I think it got goofy.

While I believe that the message of Christ brings friction...because grace is totally counter-intuitive...I don't believe that our presentation of that message should create more friction. Somewhere along the line, it seems that a large sector of the church rose up in spiritual pride, proclaiming themselves as the torch bearers of truth, chosen as the ones to bring the light into your darkness, as well as singe you with the flame, just for good measure!

Where did we get the idea that we could jam the truth down people's throats? Where in the Bible are we granted permission to be "God's Goons," shoving people around with shame and guilt when we discover sin (or what we consider sin) in their lives? Who in the world wants to be shunned, judged, and embarrassed? And when did Jesus ever use that approach?

I'm a recovering goon...how 'bout you?

Trust

2008-03-29T10:27:00.003-05:00

The newest addition to our family has been rockin' my faith a little. Baby Sloan's only a month old, but he's already messin' with my head! I don't hold it against him, though; I know it's not intentional! (ha)

But it never fails--every time I hold him to give him a bottle, or some comfort, or just some love (he's got those ultra-chubby extra-kissable cheeks on him), and especially when he's sleeping on my chest--I'm struck by not only the awesome responsibility of parenthood, but by the honest and complete trust that he has in me as his daddy.

Then it hits me...this is how I should be with God. Just as our new baby relies completely upon us as parents to provide and care for him, I should be relying completely on my Abba Father to provide and care for me. After I've done all that I can to the best of my knowledge and ability, I need to step back, breathe, relax, and TRUST completely in God for the results.

How much time do we waste because of worry? I'm determined to waste less, and trust more...

Who Needs Worship

2008-03-17T20:47:00.002-05:00

Ever wonder why most churches reserve a significant portion of their Sunday services for the singing of songs? I've had conversations with several people where that "why" question came up, and there are so many answers...God deserves our worship because He's holy, because He's good, because He's done so much for us, and on and on...but that response seems to fall short for many people.

So I'd like to pose some other questions. Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him?

What I'm hinting at (if you're totally confused right now) is that I think there's something missing inside of us if we're asking "why" worship (and I can say so, cuz I've been missing it before :-). When we truly catch a glimpse of who God really is, the automatic response of our heart is worship. It's automatic, it's irresistible, and it's authentic. If you've not experienced that feeling, then I dare say that you have not yet seen God for who He really is! (by the way, none of us have arrived...it's a never-ending journey!)

But back to my ridiculous questions: Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? NO...we worship God to remind US that He's God, because sometimes we seem to forget. Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? Please! We're the ones with insecurities, and through worship, God affirms us as His beloved! And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him? No--He's "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Heb 13:8)...but He does become "more God" within us the more we get to know Him and understand that He's greater than all of our fears, worries, and struggles.

So WHO needs worship? WE do. God is God whether we worship or not! He truly delights in our worship, but He does not need it. We're the ones who benefit. When we choose to honor Him as God and exalt Him above ourselves, there's an intrinsic realization that we were created for this, that we are loved unconditionally, that we were chosen by Him before we ever knew Him. We remind ourselves that He is God, that we are of incredible value to Him, and that with Him, we can overcome anything.

Christian?

2008-03-12T11:16:00.005-05:00

I'll never forget the girl who came up to me in high school and asked, "You remember in 7th grade when you told me I was going to hell?" I think I turned beat red and denied it because I really don't remember it, but honestly I wouldn't be surprised if it was true! I was quite the little "evangelist" at 12 years of age...

The church staff is reading a book together called Un-Christian, and it's been really insightful. It's based on actual research done by the Barna Group that has discovered that people's perception of Christianity has changed quite dramatically in the recent past, say 10 years or so, from being mostly positive to being more on the negative bent.

When I think of how I behaved as a good little church boy growing up, I have to say that I'm not surprised. I was quick to judge (and apparently quick to say so too :-), isolated myself from those who didn't believe like me, and appeared like I had it all together. I wasn't a jerk or anything; everyone who knew me liked me, but overall I feel as though I failed to connect with the culture.

Jesus was a person who lived a perfect life, but didn't broadcast it. He knew the darkness in people's hearts, but didn't judge them. He hung out with the riff-raff of society and could care less whether his reputation suffered for it. He lived every iota of what He taught as a picture of total integrity, leaving no room for hypocrisy.

Have you examined how you come across to outsiders? Are people more or less likely to consider faith in Christ after encountering you?

Baby Sloan!!

2008-02-29T12:05:00.002-06:00

We're gearing up to head home from the hospital with the newest addition to our family, Sloan Philip Ross Hollis. He arrived on Tuesday, the 26th, at 9 lbs. 14 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long...wow!! He's seriously a little hoss!

Mama is doing well, recovering more quickly from this C-section than the first, so we're thankful for that! She just got done feedin' the little man, and he's napping on her chest with that look of contentment only little babies can pull off.

As soon as Sloan got here, I found myself wondering again at the depth of God's love. Not only has he entrusted each of us with a life, knowing we would inevitably screw some stuff up, but He's also entrusted us with the lives of our children (whether they be biological or adopted), again knowing that we couldn't and wouldn't ever be perfect parents.

I was sitting in the recovery room holding Sloan and waiting for them to roll my wife in after they cleaned her up, and just started crying (again), saying, "God, I don't deserve this...thank You, thank You, thank You." His love transcends everything that we are!

Weakness

2008-02-10T16:58:00.001-06:00

None of us got it all together. I know I don't! The past few days have been a process of coming to grips with that reality all over again. Not only am I a hopeless sinner without Christ, but I am stricken with innate human weaknesses that I cannot overcome.

I'd like to think that I'm a very organized person...but I'm not. I'd like to think that I'm a great planner...but I'm not. I'd like to think that I produce best when I have total freedom with no guidelines...but I don't. And just last night, I finally realized that that's okay!

God has wired each of us so differently; we think, speak, and act in certain ways. Even if we were all raised by the same parents in the same neighborhood under the same circumstances, we would still be very different in the way we viewed and interacted with the world. Each of us would lead very different lives based on our strengths...and weaknesses...both given to us by God.

That's why I'm okay with it. I believe that I (and everyone else in the world) have been intentionally designed and hand-crafted by God himself. I believe that He put certain dreams within me that I could achieve because He also planted the necessary gifts within in me to make them happen (with His help).

I've decided not to fret or buck up against my weaknesses anymore; they are what they are, and that's why God has given me a wife and friends who are gifted where I'm not. We complete each other (yeah, I know that's a lil' cheesy, but it's true!). In Now, Discover Your Strengths, Marcus Buckingham writes that we should stop trying to "manange our weakesses" and start living our strengths; it's simple, yet profound...and a lot easier, I think!

There is strength in knowing your weaknesses...once you know them, you can accept them and stop worrying about them!

Influence

2008-02-02T16:33:00.001-06:00

The power of influence. It's an amazing thing, isn't it? For a person to dramatically affect another person, causing them to consider another avenue of thought, and consequently, a different course of action...I think that's pretty heavy!

I'm an optimist, and a naturally trusting person. But the older I get, the more aware I become of influences that I need to guard myself against in order to avoid getting blind-sided and knocked off track. There's a lot of "smart" people out there with a lot of "good" stuff to say, but without listening with the right filters, they might just "bite" you in the butt.

Think of the power of influence in history...just two names: Adolph Hitler and Martin Luther King. Two visionary leaders, passionate about their beliefs, and skilled in their use of influence. In fact, they changed the world they lived in because they used their influence effectively!

I used to think that being famous would be powerful and cool; I'm not so sure now, and it really doesn't matter. I'm just determined to use whatever level of influence God entrusts to me for purposes that are right, noble, and just. It's wild to think that God set it up like this; instead of just programming us all to think the right way, he put us in this pinball machine to bounce around and rub shoulders with all sorts of people, gleaning helpful wisdom and sifting out the meaningless.

Who's influencing you...and who are you influencing?

The Worship Staircase

2008-01-28T21:24:00.001-06:00

Growing up in a Pentecostal church, I was accustomed to very demonstrative expressions of worship. Pretty much everything was acceptable, from singing and clapping to dancing and shouting. We were labelled as weird or "holy rollers" by some (which I understand), but that's the frame of reference that I come from.

Though I don't remember this being taught from the pulpit, I grew up thinking that there were levels to worship...like an ascending staircase. The entry level was singing, where you joined the congregation during song service. Then the next step was clapping, followed by the raising of hands. The top of the staircase, the absolute pinnacle of bringing praise to God, was dancing. If you danced, you were like a professional worshiper!

Since I never danced (I was never brave enough, plus I'm a terrible dancer), I felt like I was lacking something...as if God was somewhat pleased with my singing and lifting of hands, but He was really hoping that I'd follow the example of those dancing nearby.

I've come up with my own levels, or stairs, of worship. They're not out of a book or anything, just the way I understand it. I now believe that the entry level of worship is an appreciation for God's creation...the vastness, beauty and complexity of the world we live in (I love stuff like "Planet Earth" on Discovery Channel). I think the next step is a sense of gratitude for the life that God has given us. To recognize that God entrusted this one life to each of us, knowing that we're imperfect and would mess some stuff up, but also knowing that we couldn't live a happy life unless we could choose for ourselves...that's a deep kind of love!

The next level of worship would be to take notice of God's gift of redemption to us in Jesus. He entrusted this life to us, and because we're imperfect, He made a way for us to make the wrongs right...by accepting the sacrifice of Jesus at the cross. Then comes the highest level of worship, which is not the top of the staircase, but rather a new set of stairs that we never finish climbing. To access this staircase, we must go beyond acknowledgment of God's gifts to us--the world, our lives, His own Son--and enter into a relationship with Him. Now we worship God for more than what He's done...we worship Him for who He is.

This highest level never ends, because we can never fully comprehend all of who God is. The more we get to know Him, the more reason we have to worship Him. I think that this is the truest form of worship...to worship God not just for what He's done for us, but for who He is!

GOD/DOG

2008-01-17T14:55:00.000-06:00

I read through Ephesians with a friend this week, and we talked it over together last night. It was cool! It's really insightful to hear other's perspectives on biblical truths--how they read it, process it, and what it means to their life. We all glean something different because we are so different!

Anyhow, I'm not sure if we were talking about the second chapter where it talks about "His great love with which He loved us" (vs. 4) or towards the end of the book where we're instructed to "walk in love" (5:2), but something about God's love prompted my friend to share this little tidbit with me.

He said that when he thinks about GOD, often he'll think about a DOG. After I jumped aside to make room for the imminent bolt of lightning that would snuff out his existence (ha!), I asked the only logical question: "Why?!" His answer was awesome.

No matter how you mistreat a dog, it always loves you. Even when you ignore it and act like it doesn't exist, it still meets you at the door with tail wagging and eyes begging for affection. It is thrilled to see you and be with you, regardless of how you feel towards it. When all your other friends are nowhere to be found, you can count on that one friend--your dog.

When he put it that way, I had to agree wholeheartedly! How true it is. I think the main difference is that God's already housebroken (hardy-har-har!)...but that's one analogy that'll stick with me. Sometimes I get so fed up with myself that I think God's fed up too, but when I just come to Him, I find that He always takes me just as I am.

Maybe there's a reason that GOD and DOG are made of the same letters?

Everyday Worship

2008-01-11T16:16:00.001-06:00

I find great comfort in the fact that we can engage in worship anywhere at anytime. Growing up in church I had the notion that real worship only happened on Sundays and Wednesdays when we came together to sing songs and have a service. But if that was true, how could we live out a Christian life in worship of God without looking like an idiot? (singing & clapping as we go throughout our day, kneeling in the middle of the office by the water cooler...what?)

Worship is everything we do...done to the glory of God. When we give our best effort at work because we recognize that God provided us with that opportunity to provide for our family, that's worship. When we eat healthy and work up a sweat at the gym because we're thankful for the body that God entrusted to our care, that's worship. When we love our kids and give them the time of day even when we don't feel like it because we know that God's never too busy for us, that's worship.

I'm all for corporate worship...I mean, I love it! (good thing since I'm a music pastor--ha!) But if that's the only avenue of worship that we engage in on a weekly basis, we're missing it BIG TIME! Our everyday life is meant to be lived out in worship...from work to play to church to marriage to talking, eating, drinking and laughing.

Thank God that He doesn't live only in the church, nor does He only take notice of our lives when we're singing songs about Him. Truth is He's interested in every facet of our being; after all, He made us who we are anyhow! I think He's overjoyed when we reciprocate that interest by seeking to live out the life He gave to us in perpetual worship of Him. All it takes is a decision on our part to do so!

Holy Love

2008-01-03T12:15:00.000-06:00

Driving home on the highway the other day, I suddenly found myself thinking about my wife...specifically about how I've been loving her lately. I started replaying recent scenarios in my head where she asked me to do something, and I did it, but if I'm honest, I had a pretty sorry attitude about it! If she could've heard the unspoken phrases inside my head, it woulda been on like Donkey Kong!!

Anyhow, for some reason that passage from Ephesians came trickling into my cranial cavity: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her." (Eph 5:25) I started thinking about what that meant--to love my wife "just as Christ also loved the church."

Christ loved the church SO much that He gave His life for it; He died for all people, in the hope that they would put their faith in Him as Lord and Savior. BUT here's the kicker: He did it without any promise or guarantee that ANYONE would ever put their faith in Him. He went to the cross willingly out of love for us knowing inside of Himself that it might not be accepted by any. That is a love that I do not possess or understand, but I want to.

The word "holy" has come to mean something more to me in the last few months. I used to think that it meant "exceptionally good, better than the rest," and that somehow I could achieve more holiness in my life by living well (following the rules, doing what I know I should, etc.). But I think there's a lot more to holiness than that. When we say God is holy, I think it means that He is altogether otherly; everything about Him is on a different plane, a higher dimension, a level of purity and goodness that we can never fully comprehend in this life.

So as I drove that day, I started to ask God to help me love with the holy love that He has already shown us. The kind of love that doesn't act out of any kind of selfish ambition, but simply seeks to love because I want to...because I love my wife, and I want her to know it everyday. And when I reach the end of my life and stand before God, if I can be proud of nothing else, I want to stand there in humble and reverent pride knowing that I loved my wife "just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her."

Have you taken a love inventory lately?

Be

2007-12-14T13:26:00.000-06:00

Which matters more: to be or to do?

Here lately I've found myself so busy doing that I've had moments where I wondered if it really even matters. It's this internal duplicity of loving the busy-ness of accomplishment, yet waning in dissatisfaction with the overall results. Not that the results aren't good...just not at the level that I ultimately want to achieve.

No doubt, I'm a task-oriented person; I love checking the little box in my planner beside each action item after I've finished it. But I've had to ask myself (again) if I'm more concerned with doing all that I do than I am with being all that God wants me to be...as a husband, a father, a leader, a musician, a worshiper, a man, a child of God.

Sometimes when I do, the rush of accomplishment makes me forget about how broken I am. For a moment, I'm the man, and it feels good. But just like any emotion, it doesn't last forever, and I'm soon looking at the same ol' guy in the mirror who doesn't have it all together.

But something happens when I embrace that brokenness, when I reject the facade and decide to be transparent with myself and with God. I discover that in no way, shape, or form is His love for me dependent on my performance, my accomplishment, or my track record. His love is His love, and it never changes...it's always been amazing, and it will always be! There's nothing I can do to earn it, or to make myself unworthy of it.

Not that I'm gonna cease to do, but I'm gonna make more time to be. To be broken, to be vulnerable, to be brave, to be real, to be loved...because I am, regardless of how much I do or don't do.

When was the last time you took time just to be?

Gifted

2007-11-03T10:49:00.000-05:00

In school, it meant "smarter than the rest." I think it means much more, and applies to everyone. God has given every person on the planet a specific gift(s), as unique to them as their appearance and personality.

When I hear someone say, "That guy is gifted," I no longer assume his IQ is higher than the status quo. Instead, I recognize that he has found an outlet to utilize the unique abilities that have been planted in him, and it shows...cuz it always does!

In life, we make countless choices. One of my most recent, and I think most important, is to put my gifts to work like never before. There's much than I can do, but less that I should...cuz I'm not meant to do it all, and I'm most effective where I'm gifted. I'm learning to do less and lead more--inviting others into the game who can do it better than me because they're gifted for it!

Until we're using our gifts, we're only partially alive.

Our Father

2007-10-25T10:44:00.000-05:00

I had a moment the other day with my son, who turns two this weekend. He's reached the age where he volunteers kisses and hugs without being prompted, and it's stinkin' cute! If he gives Mommy a kiss, he has to give Daddy one, too...ya know, keep the balance in the force.

Anyhow, he started walking towards me from across the room the other day and said, "Give Daddy tiss?" (all the "k" sounds come out as a "t" right now) Of course, my heart melted, I smiled, and scooped him up so he could lay one on me...and then the thought hit me.

What a picture that is of us with our Father God! Not that we can actually "lay one on Him" (which is kind of a weird thought), but our worship is an expression of love that we choose to give Him...and He chooses to receive it! And--He actually looks forward to it just like I look forward to my son reaching out to me! I think it pulls on His heart strings when we lavish our worship on Him, and He can't resist returning the embrace. After all, He created us to be with Him, so why would He ever turn away?

When my little boy spoke those words, I didn't point out the flaws in his grammar or his approach. I just simply opened my arms and relished the fact that he wanted to love on me. It's that way with God too. We don't have to speak or pray the magic words or sing with perfect pitch. We just come...and find Him waiting there, ready for us to "lay one on Him."

Questions

2007-10-13T11:25:00.002-05:00

Father God,

Thank You for the questions that litter my mind. The questions that I'll never be able to answer or explain. Questions that fascinate me, frustrate me, inspire me, and divide me. Thank You for allowing the confusion that sometimes results from my search for truth, because within that confusion, I realize that I'm not meant to know it all. It becomes clear that You, and only You, are the One who has all the answers. And I discover that when I'm with You, I don't have to know it all...because You do, and You love me. Thank You for being as close as I'll allow, and for always being available to me. I know the questions will come and go, but You never will.

Thank You, Lord. Amen.

You Did What?

2007-10-01T14:31:00.001-05:00

Yep...we did it. Last Sunday we put together a Letterman-style service called "The Sunday Morning Show." We had the desk, the band, the guests, the monologue, the top 10, and even commercial breaks! We had no idea how it would turn out, but we busted our butts to make it the best we knew how...and it happened! It actually came together impressively well for our first go, and surprisingly enough, touched people's hearts.

I'm sure that there are probably those that think what we did was a waste of a perfectly good Sunday morning, and we should feel guilty for neglecting an opportunity to present Christ. I know I would've not too many years ago. But that's mainly because I had a box that church fit into, where creativity was limited to just a few channels of possibility.

That's what has been so cool about our "show." We've heard a lot of great feedback, not only about how funny it was, but also how meaningful it was. We planned it and prayed that way, but we were nervous as to how clearly the message would come across. Once again, God came through and proved to me again that He does NOT fit, nor belong, in any box.

He's the Creator...why wouldn't He bless creativity?

Looks Matter!

2007-09-13T17:16:00.000-05:00

I recently read an article that made us change up our stage setup. I'm a church boy, we're a church, and just like growing up in your parent's house, you do things a certain way until either the light comes on automatically or someone helps flip the switch for you. In this case, it was the latter for me.

Anyhow, here's the question that got me: Where else in the world do you walk into a musical venue and all the singers are lined across the front of the stage with the band either crammed into a corner or serving as the backdrop for the singers...but CHURCH? Not to say that that's the wrong way to do it or anything, but our church is very strategic in reaching un-churced people. So we want to do everything that we can to create a welcoming and normal atmosphere for those who have never been exposed to church before! The goal is to remove any controllable hindrance from the path of those who are seeking truth in order to help them find the One they're looking for.

It's cool when you get that feeling inside of you that goes deeper than the buzz you get from just a good idea, ya know? That's what I felt when I read this...like God was suggesting this. "It's not just a good idea...it's a GOD idea!" Yes, I hear you laughing (mostly staff), but I don't care!

Homeless

2007-09-13T16:40:00.001-05:00

A week ago Saturday, Pastor Timmy and I spent 24 hours in the shoes of a homeless person. We were dropped off at 7:00 a.m. down by The Plaza, and we were on foot with only the goods in our backpack until 7:00 a.m. the next morning when we arrived at church unshaved, unshowered, and feeling not so fresh (for real).

I was amazed at how many homeless people we encountered and got the chance to talk to...I guess when you're actually looking, it makes a difference! We heard so many different stories of how these people ended up on the street, and when you really think about it, most of us are not that far removed...say, maybe a paycheck or two?

I'll never forget the people we met, especially this one guy. His name was Richard, and we ran into him in the middle of a park across from one of the nicest hotels in the city. It appeared he was hiding; he was enclosed in a landscaped area of small trees and shrubs, and he was leaning back on his pack smoking a cigarette. But when I approached him and said hello, he was nothing but polite, and immediately started talking like he hadn't had a decent conversation in a while. After about a half hour of chit chat, he looked at me and said, "Thanks for stoppin', man. You see all these people walking by here...they don't give a f---. Thanks for listening. Thanks for lettin' me get that off my chest."

I felt like we did more for Richard by simply acknowledging his existence and lending an ear than we ever could have by giving him money. In fact, he never asked for a dime. Instead, I think he felt that we were actually interested in who he was, where he's been, and where he's going.

As we walked on with sore feet and sunburnt faces, I felt this little glimmer of hope inside of me. What if everyone treated these people like they were valuable, like they mattered, like they had purpose? What if we all treated people--all people--the way Jesus would?

Charity is one thing...love is another.

Why Worship?

2007-08-18T21:47:00.001-05:00

I recently started a new book called Experiential Worship and ran across a quote that I think I've heard before, but had forgotten: "Worship is the one thing that we can give to God that He doesn't already have."

Wow! That's stinkin' cool...to think that we can actually give God a gift!

Ever since I read it, it's been bouncin' around in my head, and it feels as though someone has sprayed starter fluid into the carbeurator of my worship engine. I grew up hearing phrases in church like, "If you'll praise God, He'll show up" and, "There's something special that happens when we all come together to worship God." While I don't discredit those statements completely, there were times that I felt as though we were saying that we could somehow manipulate God to "show up" or that we could "stir up" something if everybody would just get into it.

It seems this quote has helped me to see the deeper beauty of worship again. God loves us so much that He has never and will never take away our power of choice. When we make the conscience decision to direct our worship to Him, it is His pleasure to "show up" and be with us. When we take inventory of our lives and recognize that no matter how much we accumulate, there's no real meaning to life without Him, and we choose to reach out to Him, He reaches back!

What an amazing truth it is...God made the sun, moon, and stars. He owns "the cattle on a thousand hills" (Ps. 50:10). "The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it" (Ps. 24:1). It's all His, but He doesn't have our worship unless we choose to give it to Him...He's already chosen us (How? Well, for one, He died on the cross for our sin...hello!). Now, He patiently waits for us to choose Him.

We don't, and can't, manipulate God, but He has made some promises to us that we can bank on: "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you" (James 4:8)..."For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them" (Matt. 18:20)..."The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth" (Ps. 145:18). When we choose to truly worship God, He's there because He wants to be, and He responds to us making the first move. As much as He wants to be with us, He won't impose...He's a respectable gentleman, and waits to be invited.

It's crazy cool...when you choose to give Him your worship, you get to be with Him (the all-powerful-massively-huge-God-of-the-universe). Then the more you get to be with Him, the more you wanna worship. What a beautiful upwards spiral it is! It becomes no longer just worshiping Him because it's your unique gift; you wanna do it because you've gotten to know Him, and who He is so incredible!

Guilt

2007-08-11T17:10:00.000-05:00

I've been praying for a close friend of mine who is struggling with feelings of shame and guilt, and this Bible verse came to mind that I heard often growing up in church:

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." Romans 8:1

I couldn't count the number of times I've heard that verse or quoted it myself, but as I prayed, it hit me in a new way. It's the word "in" that got me. I think we are all prone to guilt, whether we profess faith in Christ or not, because deep down we know what's right and wrong..."the law written in their hearts." (Rom. 2:15) However, I think this passage offers clear hope to those who do believe that their past is no longer an issue.

So why do so many Christians still struggle with guilt? Granted, there is an enemy of our soul who constantly tries to remind of us of our mistakes to drag us down and hold us back from the future that God intends, and we must take up our shield of faith. But that word "in" really means something.

If you're a Christian, that means you've accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, and the Holy Spirit now lives "inside" you. He helps you lead a better life, and you find fulfillment living and growing "in" Him. At some point, many Christians become stagnant in their growth, and suddenly find themselves fighting a constant battle against the memory of their failures. Read the verse again like this:

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." Romans 8:1

He might be in you, but are you in Him?

Kindness

2007-07-31T15:09:00.001-05:00

Who hasn't seen the bumper sticker: "Practice random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty?" Seriously, the first time I saw it, I thought it was a joke...but I didn't get it. I was thinking "whoever made that up isn't very funny."

When I realized it was for real, I felt a lil' stupid, and I thought it was kinda cool. It's like another version of the Golden Rule, ya know? I was reminded of it by an older movie I just watched yesterday called "To End All Wars." It's a pretty heavy war movie (definitely not light-hearted), but has a powerful message.

I had heard the story of a WWII prison camp where the Allied prisoners studied philosophy and Bible scripture together at what they called Jungle University. Through the hope and inspiration they discovered in their learning, they were able to complete their forced labor--building the Thailand-Burma railroad--ahead of schedule and won the hearts of their captors. That's the story this movie tells.

One of the biggest God-truths that I've rediscovered since working with Mercy Church comes from Romans 2:4 "Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance?" As I watched this movie, that truth came to mind. As half-starved prisoners truly practiced "random acts of kindness," the very men who oppressed them...many to death...became witnesses of something amazing, transforming, and other-wordly. It transcended culture, language, and even war.

In Psalms, David writes about the "lovingkindness" of God often...I think we could definitely use a lot more of that in our world. The kind that takes the initiative, makes no sense, and expects nothing in return. What power lies therein!

Faith

2007-07-25T19:38:00.000-05:00

Cinnamon raisin biscuits from Hardee's...they don't have 'em anymore, but they used to, and they were the bomb! They had this warm, gooey white frosting if they were fresh, and my brother and I would always get 'em on the mornings that Dad woke us up early before school to go to breakfast.

That's what came to mind as I did my devotion the other day in Ephesians 5 & 6. Dad always prayed with us on the drive from Hardee's to the junior high, and part of that prayer was the "Armor of God" from Eph. 6:10-20. When I read it again over the weekend, vs. 16 brought me to a halt. The version I read said, "Above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one."

It's that "above all" part that got me. There are several Godly attributes listed here: truth, righteousness, peace, salvation, prayer...but it's the "shield of faith" that gets the mantra "above all." Why? I thought about it a lot, and I came up with three reasons that resonate with me:

We can lead a "good" life, doing our best to tell the truth and do the right thing, but if we don't have a real faith in our hearts that believes in a real God, what's it all for anyhow?Heb. 11:6 "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

I don't think that most people consider faith as a shield. It seems they treat it more as a banner, waving it around and knocking others who don't believe the same way in the head with the flagpost. What's up with that?! A shield is primarily a defensive weapon... Maybe it would serve us believers well to stop flailing around so much and live out our beliefs meekly, keeping our shield up and our hands free to do some work for God.

Many people struggle with self-doubt, including me. I read a book that showed me that my greatest strength is BELIEF. That has really changed the way I look at my life. Do I really believe in God? Do I really believe in the big dreams that He's put in my heart? Do I really believe in myself enough to get there? I should...because He does.

Take up your shield...you might be surprised by what doesn't bother you anymore!

Wonder

2007-07-13T07:43:00.001-05:00

I've been on vacation with the fam all week down in Gulf Shores. We've been chillin' at the beach or the pool most of the time, but on Wednesday I got to go deep sea fishing--a Father's Day idea my wife had (ain't she sweet!).

So I caught about five fish, all just big enough to swallow my bait and leave nothing for the big guns...but it was still a lot of fun. We went through a couple of rainstorms (I momentarily lapsed into a state of panic from a flashback of "The Perfect Storm") and saw some dolphins on the way back to shore.

As we cruised along through the surf, I was struck again by the sheer magnitude of the world that God has made. Not only the size, but also the incessant activity of it all...the endless swelling of the ocean, the sophisticated ecosystems that function without us even knowing, the weather systems that feed the earth with necessary rain. None of it misses God's watchful eye.

Not only that, but God is incredibly interested in each of us--Jer 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you." He places each of us at a strategic point in history, designs us for success in the role He's gifted us to play, and He stands ready and willing to help us achieve the goals that He has planted within our hearts. AND He's personal about it--Matt 10:30 "And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered." To think that He knows the millions of trillions of hairs on the heads of the billions of people that have ever walked the face of the planet is almost beyond comprehension. He knows us inside and out!

In Blue Like Jazz, Donald Miller writes that one of the highest forms of worship is wonder. I think he's right. When I stop trying to verbalize everything in my heart to God and just stand there in speechless reverence, something happens. I feel small...because I am small. I feel humble...because He's so great. I feel loved...because I am loved.

May we never lose our sense of wonder.

Love and Marriage

2007-06-25T18:26:00.000-05:00

This weekend my wife and I celebrated our fifth anniversary, and it was awesome! We went out to dinner, then to the movies, got a hotel room, slept in, went to brunch, saw another movie, and just enjoyed the whole day together! It's not often, being parents, that we get to do that, and it got me thinking.

Have I been the husband that I want to be over the last five years? Am I a living reality of the dream that my wife has had in her heart since she was a little girl? Is there ever a day, much less a minute, that my wife doesn't know and feel the love that I have for her? What do I want the next five years of my marriage to look like?

They say with age comes wisdom (though I'm not sure it's true for everyone--ha!). However, one gem that I've learned thus far is that God has entrusted to us all an amazing level of control over our own destiny. He makes the plan, but it's up to us to choose it, embrace it, and pursue it. The same holds true in the married relationship.

Happily ever after doesn't just happen, but I believe it can and it should! What we don't always realize is that it takes a conscious, tenacious determination on our part to choose marriage, embrace it, and pursue our spouse like we're not really married. That means choosing love when you don't "feel" it, giving to your spouse even when your needs aren't being met, and keeping short accounts of fallouts (not letting stuff simmer and sour).

I want the next five years of my married life to be even more amazing than the first five. I want to be a better husband to my wife, father to my son, servant of Christ and the church. I know it won't just happen, but I'm ready and willing to do the work to get there. Are you?

Get Dirty

2007-06-22T14:57:00.000-05:00

I've spent the better part of today trying to replace the two feet of PVC pipe that lines the holes for our church banner signposts. I've broken three drain spades, I'm soaked in sweat (it's like 90 today), and I've got mud caked under my fingernails that smells like the elephant cage at the zoo. Ya know that sewer smell that you don't just smell, you feel? Yeah...it's that smell.

Anyhow, when I broke the third shovel, I was not feeling particularly pleasant, nor was I inclined to behave the way a Christian probably should. However, in the back of my mind was a voice whispering little bits of wisdom like, "it's all for Christ" and, "God sees your efforts" and "don't chuck the rest of that shovel out into traffic."

Even though I know it's true that God sees all and takes notice of everything in our lives, those moments of time serve as micro-tests of our faith, as well as what's in our hearts. I gotta be honest--when I heard the wood crackle and break on that third shovel, there was more stuff stirring in my heart than just "God" thoughts! Proverbs 14:23 says, "In ALL labor there is profit," but sometimes it just doesn't feel like it!

Sometimes you do all you can, get diry doin' it, and it still doesn't come together like you hoped or planned. But the simple truth is this: God is much more interested in the motivation of our hearts than he is in the sum of our results.

Good thing...I still didn't get the posts up!

Everything You Want!

2007-06-12T14:52:00.000-05:00

I'm a PK...translation=Preacher's Kid. That means I literally cut my teeth on the pew, grew up knowing the "inside scoop" on church life, and was ingrained with the Christianese language (a mode of spoken communication only understood by long-term believers). Wow--I just realized that I am in fact bi-lingual...I've gotta start putting that on my resume!

Anyhow, growing up in church, my favorite Scripture became Psalm 37:4 - "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." I figured hey, I'm already in this church thing and I believe in Jesus, so this is telling me that I can just keep being a good little church boy and then God will give me everything I want...SWEET! I started a running list: a Lamborghini Countach (red), the helicopter from Airwolf, the Fall Guy's girlfriend (Heather Thomas, I think).

Needless to say, I don't drive a car that's worth more than my house and I'm not married to the co-star of an '80's mini-series (in fact, I married much better). I figured either God didn't like me much, or there was something wrong with my Biblical interpretation. Knowing God to be pretty incredible in the love department, I decided that I was at fault, and had to relinquish my hopes of being a self-prayed super hero.

That verse is still my favorite, but it means something entirely different to me today. I realize now that if we all got what we asked for, the world would be pretty jacked up (not to mention the fact that there's no way Lamborghini could keep up with demand). I think that our focus needs to be on the first half: "Delight yourself in the Lord." If we find our identity, our purpose, and our fulfillment in God, then the second half will ring true: "and he will give you the desires of your heart." He knows us better than we know ourselves--knows what will hurt us, what will excite us, what will fulfill us. When we choose Him and open our hearts to Him, He's then able to transplant our wrong desires with right ones. We find ourselves wanting different things that we did before (although a Countach would still be sweet to have).

It's pretty amazing how God can change your heart from just wanting for yourself to wanting for others. To go from dreaming only about your own life to being possessed to influence the lives of others. And then to realize that not only has God remade your heart, not only has He given you brand new desires, but now He's going to grant those new desires that He put inside of you...that's stinkin' AWESOME man!! You get to experience the fulfillment of your dreams--the dreams that count for something beyond this life, the dreams that you didn't just come up with on your own, the dreams that bring true joy and meaning to earthly existence.

That's my two-cents for today...and ya know what--my first blog ever! Hope you didn't fall asleep.