Yesterday my wife & I celebrated our eighth anniversary. Crazy how time flies when you're having fun! :-) But I'm so glad I married the woman I did, and here's a few reasons why:
1) She is beautiful. Not just the "super gorgeous" kind of beautiful, cuz she is, but I mean TRULY beautiful. Her insides match her outsides. She is compassionate, caring, honest, intuitive, lovably stubborn, and willing to sacrifice for the greater good. Her love for God is reflected in the way she lives and how she treats others; it's not just something that she talks about.
2) She is real. She doesn't sugar-coat the truth, which I so appreciate (except for the times she calls me on the carpet, which has only happened like once...ha!). She shoots straight and calls it how she sees it, simplifying the process of getting to the heart of the matter, whatever it may be.
3) She is funny. Seriously, she cracks me up all the time. Even when I wish she would stop the incessant sarcasm, somehow she turns it around on itself to make me laugh yet again (which is irritating when I'm really trying to be mad). God knew I needed someone who would balance my sometimes-too-serious outlook on life!
4) She is committed. Even when we're at odds, I know she's not thinking about walking out on me. We have had our share of knock-down, drag-out fights through the years, but we have learned to fight fair, to make amends as soon as possible, and to learn from each altercation (which are usually her fault anyhow...ha ha...yeah right!).
5) She is strong. Every time I play Mr. Mom and handle the kids on my own, I am amazed by what my wife does as a mother, as well as a wife! Truth is I couldn't do what she does, and I know it. She is gifted in ways that I am not, and I'm evermore grateful that she is mine with each passing day.
If you haven't told the one you love WHY you love them so much...remind them--and yourself.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Monday, May 31, 2010
The Unnatural Phenomenon of Rest
The title says it all...my question is WHY? I'm on the second week of vacation with my family in Myrtle Beach, having a killer time, but it took me nearly the whole first week to decompress and begin to truly relax. As I ask myself why my mind's button is literally stuck in the "ON" position, why I brought work with me on a trip intended to escape from it temporarily, I'm reminded of Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."
I've got issues, I know...that's step one, right? Admitting the problem? :-) Among them is the weakness of my work ethic, but not in the sense that one might assume. Every job I've ever had, from lawn care to janitor to teaching to waiter to construction to milk man to ministry, I have given 100%...and I always will. It's part of my nature, it's the way I was raised, it's the way I believe God intends us to live. My weakness lies not in my labor, but in my rest. I have never prioritized quality, healthy rest the way I should, and I see it more clearly now than ever because it has grown in necessity as my life has grown in complexity. And I think that rest is part of one's work ethic, because it directly affects the capacity and quality of work that one is capable of!
For me, rest is unnatural. Escape is natural, but not rest...and there's a difference. I can watch a good movie and manage to escape reality for a few hours, but I don't necessarily find rest. I can go on a 10-minute motorcycle ride and actually find more rest in it than I do a two-hour nap. The answer is not directly related to gasoline and horsepower, although that never hurts (wink), but rather that every time I get on my motorcycle, I find my mind connecting with God as my senses experience the wonder and beauty of His creation, reminding me (again) of how great He is, and how great He thinks I am because He made all of this for my enjoyment.
"Come to Me...and I will give you rest." Once again, He is the answer...always has been and always will be. It is when I come to Him that I truly find rest for my soul, renewal for my mind, passion in my heart, fuel for my body. I'm committing (again) to come to Him for rest, to do the things that connect me with Him more regularly. I'm reminded of a teaching I once heard about the story of creation, and how "the evening and the morning were the first day" (Gen. 1:5). Notice that the evening is listed FIRST, which represents rest. God set it up for us to operate from a place of rest and restoration, so we should do our part in finding that place every day!
If rest is unnatural for you as it is for me, let's change it! That's not what God intended, and it's not what we should settle for...
I've got issues, I know...that's step one, right? Admitting the problem? :-) Among them is the weakness of my work ethic, but not in the sense that one might assume. Every job I've ever had, from lawn care to janitor to teaching to waiter to construction to milk man to ministry, I have given 100%...and I always will. It's part of my nature, it's the way I was raised, it's the way I believe God intends us to live. My weakness lies not in my labor, but in my rest. I have never prioritized quality, healthy rest the way I should, and I see it more clearly now than ever because it has grown in necessity as my life has grown in complexity. And I think that rest is part of one's work ethic, because it directly affects the capacity and quality of work that one is capable of!
For me, rest is unnatural. Escape is natural, but not rest...and there's a difference. I can watch a good movie and manage to escape reality for a few hours, but I don't necessarily find rest. I can go on a 10-minute motorcycle ride and actually find more rest in it than I do a two-hour nap. The answer is not directly related to gasoline and horsepower, although that never hurts (wink), but rather that every time I get on my motorcycle, I find my mind connecting with God as my senses experience the wonder and beauty of His creation, reminding me (again) of how great He is, and how great He thinks I am because He made all of this for my enjoyment.
"Come to Me...and I will give you rest." Once again, He is the answer...always has been and always will be. It is when I come to Him that I truly find rest for my soul, renewal for my mind, passion in my heart, fuel for my body. I'm committing (again) to come to Him for rest, to do the things that connect me with Him more regularly. I'm reminded of a teaching I once heard about the story of creation, and how "the evening and the morning were the first day" (Gen. 1:5). Notice that the evening is listed FIRST, which represents rest. God set it up for us to operate from a place of rest and restoration, so we should do our part in finding that place every day!
If rest is unnatural for you as it is for me, let's change it! That's not what God intended, and it's not what we should settle for...
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Heartbeat
Ya know those moments when time stands still and you find yourself thinking about life in a different way? I've had two of those moments within the past 24 hours.
Last night I had to drive home and grab my trumpet cuz I realized I had forgotten to bring it with me for lessons. I had a 10-minute window, so I left the car running, ran inside, ran out, jumped in and took off. Upon reaching the intersection that I just came through, a half mile down the road from our subdivision, I was among the first people to stop at a horrific accident. There was a mangled pickup flipped in the ditch, with the driver still strapped in his seatbelt hanging upside down. In the opposing lane was a compact sedan that had been slammed by the truck to the point that you could not tell what kind of car it was.
I got out to see if I could be of any assistance, and on first glance, I thought the woman driving the car was dead. Then I noticed that she was breathing, though slumped over and unresponsive, and went to check on the driver of the truck, who seemed fine. A few minutes later, I left to get out of the way of emergency vehicles as they arrived. Three hours later on my way home, the intersection was still closed as the accident was being investigated.
I kept thinking to myself, "I was at that exact spot in a moment of time not more than 60 seconds prior that happening." And as I earnestly prayed for the people involved, I was also grateful that it wasn't me. I realized again how precious and fragile life really is.
Today I met my wife at her OB appointment, and had another moment. The doc pulled out the little ultrasound dealy and moved it around on her belly until he found it...the heartbeat of our third child. There's something about that sound that makes everything else inside of you shut up and listen. The sound of new life being knit together, vivacious and tenacious...what a beautiful sound! Makes me tear up right now thinking about it; makes me wanna be the father my children deserve all over again. At what point do some of us stop living, when we all started out so determined and unstoppable?
Life is a gift. Every heartbeat, every minute, every memory. May we never take for granted this precious gift; may we make the most of all of it--the good, the bad, and the ugly. We won't pass this way twice, only once. Let's live while we're here baby! "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." --Jesus
Last night I had to drive home and grab my trumpet cuz I realized I had forgotten to bring it with me for lessons. I had a 10-minute window, so I left the car running, ran inside, ran out, jumped in and took off. Upon reaching the intersection that I just came through, a half mile down the road from our subdivision, I was among the first people to stop at a horrific accident. There was a mangled pickup flipped in the ditch, with the driver still strapped in his seatbelt hanging upside down. In the opposing lane was a compact sedan that had been slammed by the truck to the point that you could not tell what kind of car it was.
I got out to see if I could be of any assistance, and on first glance, I thought the woman driving the car was dead. Then I noticed that she was breathing, though slumped over and unresponsive, and went to check on the driver of the truck, who seemed fine. A few minutes later, I left to get out of the way of emergency vehicles as they arrived. Three hours later on my way home, the intersection was still closed as the accident was being investigated.
I kept thinking to myself, "I was at that exact spot in a moment of time not more than 60 seconds prior that happening." And as I earnestly prayed for the people involved, I was also grateful that it wasn't me. I realized again how precious and fragile life really is.
Today I met my wife at her OB appointment, and had another moment. The doc pulled out the little ultrasound dealy and moved it around on her belly until he found it...the heartbeat of our third child. There's something about that sound that makes everything else inside of you shut up and listen. The sound of new life being knit together, vivacious and tenacious...what a beautiful sound! Makes me tear up right now thinking about it; makes me wanna be the father my children deserve all over again. At what point do some of us stop living, when we all started out so determined and unstoppable?
Life is a gift. Every heartbeat, every minute, every memory. May we never take for granted this precious gift; may we make the most of all of it--the good, the bad, and the ugly. We won't pass this way twice, only once. Let's live while we're here baby! "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." --Jesus
Monday, March 22, 2010
Redefining Success
I just finished reading a great book for the second time, and I highly recommend it...it's called "The Traveler's Gift" by Andy Andrews. It changed the way I think about life both times I read it, and I handed it off to another friend yesterday to help him in his journey, because it's helped me so much in mine.
Some things are genetic, some things are learned, but the only things that are permanent are the things we choose to believe. For far too long, I've believed something about my life that, until now, I have been unable to identify as false, even ridiculous. There has been an underlying feeling of failure within myself that ebbs and flows, but never subsides. No matter how much I accomplish or succeed at certain aspects of life, I don't feel like a success. Why?
Even within the context of spirituality, having established a connection with the divine as a child and walking in close relationship with God throughout my life thus far, why do I feel this way? When I know I am loved unconditionally despite my faults and failures, and there is no need to prove anything to Him, why do I feel the need to prove so much to myself?
I am finally learning to love myself more truly. It's funny...I've always seen the best in people, and never had that much trouble loving them, but I've had a heck of a time loving me. Somehow I haven't measured up to all the high expectations that I established for myself many years ago (maybe because some of my expectations are a little crazy). The love of God is unconditional, so if His love is in me, why am I conditional with myself? It's funny how you can be gracious with others, while withholding grace from yourself.
For much of my life, I've allowed my financial prowess (or lack thereof :-) to dominate my feelings of success. While part of that is innate as a man, much of it is tied to the "American dream," and the culture we live in. But I work for a church, and I'm a musician...that's two strikes right there! Ha! But in all seriousness, I am fed up with the tide of worry and fear that has washed up discouragement and despair on the shores of my cerebral cortex!! As a Christ follower, I know that something's wrong when my decisions are being guided more by fear than by faith.
So what is "success?" I think it's much more tied to who you are than what you do. Even if you DO a lot, that in itself does not make you successful. If I had accomplished all my big dreams, but died without ever loving myself simply and completely, I missed the mark! And as I write this, I wonder if I'm writing these words as a cop out because I haven't attained the Everest-esque peaks that I had hoped to reach by now...but for me, I can honestly say no. Because even if I was that high, I'd still be searching for what I've found "down" here.
Simply put, I am enough. I am married to an all-around beautiful woman, who I love more today than ever before. I have two awesome little boys, and another bun in the oven (due in September...woo hoo!). I am following a bigger plan for my life than I made for myself (not bigger in the vein of how I used to think, but bigger because it's not mine...wink). I get to do what I love for a living alongside other people who truly love me for me. I have true friends, who will be friends for a lifetime.
Money is nice. Accomplishment feels good. But living in faith, hope, and most of all, love...that is success!
Some things are genetic, some things are learned, but the only things that are permanent are the things we choose to believe. For far too long, I've believed something about my life that, until now, I have been unable to identify as false, even ridiculous. There has been an underlying feeling of failure within myself that ebbs and flows, but never subsides. No matter how much I accomplish or succeed at certain aspects of life, I don't feel like a success. Why?
Even within the context of spirituality, having established a connection with the divine as a child and walking in close relationship with God throughout my life thus far, why do I feel this way? When I know I am loved unconditionally despite my faults and failures, and there is no need to prove anything to Him, why do I feel the need to prove so much to myself?
I am finally learning to love myself more truly. It's funny...I've always seen the best in people, and never had that much trouble loving them, but I've had a heck of a time loving me. Somehow I haven't measured up to all the high expectations that I established for myself many years ago (maybe because some of my expectations are a little crazy). The love of God is unconditional, so if His love is in me, why am I conditional with myself? It's funny how you can be gracious with others, while withholding grace from yourself.
For much of my life, I've allowed my financial prowess (or lack thereof :-) to dominate my feelings of success. While part of that is innate as a man, much of it is tied to the "American dream," and the culture we live in. But I work for a church, and I'm a musician...that's two strikes right there! Ha! But in all seriousness, I am fed up with the tide of worry and fear that has washed up discouragement and despair on the shores of my cerebral cortex!! As a Christ follower, I know that something's wrong when my decisions are being guided more by fear than by faith.
So what is "success?" I think it's much more tied to who you are than what you do. Even if you DO a lot, that in itself does not make you successful. If I had accomplished all my big dreams, but died without ever loving myself simply and completely, I missed the mark! And as I write this, I wonder if I'm writing these words as a cop out because I haven't attained the Everest-esque peaks that I had hoped to reach by now...but for me, I can honestly say no. Because even if I was that high, I'd still be searching for what I've found "down" here.
Simply put, I am enough. I am married to an all-around beautiful woman, who I love more today than ever before. I have two awesome little boys, and another bun in the oven (due in September...woo hoo!). I am following a bigger plan for my life than I made for myself (not bigger in the vein of how I used to think, but bigger because it's not mine...wink). I get to do what I love for a living alongside other people who truly love me for me. I have true friends, who will be friends for a lifetime.
Money is nice. Accomplishment feels good. But living in faith, hope, and most of all, love...that is success!
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Fascination
A clip from a great article below...makes you wonder if you're the type of person who brings people closer to God, or drives them further away!
"The more I have read the Bible and studied the life of Jesus, the more I have become convinced that Christianity spreads best not through force but through fascination. But over the past few decades our Christianity, at least here in the United States, has become less and less fascinating. We have given the atheists less and less to disbelieve. And the sort of Christianity many of us have seen on TV and heard on the radio looks less and less like Jesus"
"The more I have read the Bible and studied the life of Jesus, the more I have become convinced that Christianity spreads best not through force but through fascination. But over the past few decades our Christianity, at least here in the United States, has become less and less fascinating. We have given the atheists less and less to disbelieve. And the sort of Christianity many of us have seen on TV and heard on the radio looks less and less like Jesus"
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Real Life Puppets?
I was part of a small group recently that read "The Shack" together (which is a MUST read if you haven't read it!), and we had a great discussion about predestination. I've found myself thinking about it more and more as of late. Basically there are two views on this:
1) Calvinist - believe that everything that we experience in life was decided beforehand by God to come to pass, and we pretty much have no power over it. Certain people are appointed for salvation, while others are destined for damnation.
2) Arminian - believe that humanity is empowered with free will and we each choose the path we will take. Salvation is available to any and all who will receive it, and God's will is "conditional" based on the choices we make.
Our discussion focused around whether or not the choices we make in life are already written in God's "manual" for our lives. Are we just puppets, oblivious to the marionette strings attached, mistakenly convinced of our own independence; or are we actually able to exercise a power of choice that can truly alter and decide the course of our lives?
I am definitely more of an Arminian, believing in free will and the God-bestowed power within us to decide our own destiny (side note: a member of our group said, "All worship leaders are Arminian!" --can you say stereotype? :-). I have considered the possibility, however, of God's absolute foreknowledge, and how that relates to predestination. Maybe we're not predestined for certain things, but God knows exactly what will transpire before it actually happens. When God confronted the apostle Paul on the road to Damascus, afflicting him with blindness, do you think He knew that he would eventually change his life and become one of the most influential leaders of the Christian church? I do.
When I think about times in my life when I have felt forgotten or ignored by God, even victimized by circumstances that I did not choose, I can see in hindsight how those moments have become turning points, milestones, proving grounds that have forever impacted my life. I've changed my thinking from "thank God I'm not there anymore" to "thank God I WAS THERE." At the end of the day, the answer to the question of whether God is the supreme puppetmaster over humanity doesn't wreck my faith...because more than anything, He is LOVE. If I am just a marionette doing His dance, I'm just glad it doesn't feel that way.
1) Calvinist - believe that everything that we experience in life was decided beforehand by God to come to pass, and we pretty much have no power over it. Certain people are appointed for salvation, while others are destined for damnation.
2) Arminian - believe that humanity is empowered with free will and we each choose the path we will take. Salvation is available to any and all who will receive it, and God's will is "conditional" based on the choices we make.
Our discussion focused around whether or not the choices we make in life are already written in God's "manual" for our lives. Are we just puppets, oblivious to the marionette strings attached, mistakenly convinced of our own independence; or are we actually able to exercise a power of choice that can truly alter and decide the course of our lives?
I am definitely more of an Arminian, believing in free will and the God-bestowed power within us to decide our own destiny (side note: a member of our group said, "All worship leaders are Arminian!" --can you say stereotype? :-). I have considered the possibility, however, of God's absolute foreknowledge, and how that relates to predestination. Maybe we're not predestined for certain things, but God knows exactly what will transpire before it actually happens. When God confronted the apostle Paul on the road to Damascus, afflicting him with blindness, do you think He knew that he would eventually change his life and become one of the most influential leaders of the Christian church? I do.
When I think about times in my life when I have felt forgotten or ignored by God, even victimized by circumstances that I did not choose, I can see in hindsight how those moments have become turning points, milestones, proving grounds that have forever impacted my life. I've changed my thinking from "thank God I'm not there anymore" to "thank God I WAS THERE." At the end of the day, the answer to the question of whether God is the supreme puppetmaster over humanity doesn't wreck my faith...because more than anything, He is LOVE. If I am just a marionette doing His dance, I'm just glad it doesn't feel that way.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Vantage Point
OK, so going on a Bahamas cruise in January when you call Kansas home is a beautiful thing! Although coming back to said home involves a considerable degree of anguish, it's worth the pain. We went from 75 degrees in shorts and flip flops to 29 degrees with "make you feel naked" wind...ouch. But the preview of what spring and summer have to offer was nice!
Just a couple thoughts to share. It had been cloudy all week before we left town last Friday. Not just the few puffy clouds in the sky kind of cloudy, but the "I don't even know if there is still a sun" kind of cloudy. The kind where after a few days, you start to realize that it's affecting your mood rather strongly, especially when you find yourself staring at screen savers of sunsets and the like.
So we got on the plane at 6:25 Friday morning. It's just before dawn, but darker than normal because it's still cloudy. As the plane takes off, I'm watching my 4-year-old peer out the cabin window, enjoying how he gets a kick out of how fast we're going as the trees below shrink into shrubs. It's not long before we're reaching the layer of clouds that have shrouded the Midwest like a dirty blanket all week, and within seconds we're poking out the other side. As we do, I catch the first glimpse of the sun rising in the east.
A simple moment in time, but a small voice inside said, "The sun still shines even when you can't see it." Though hidden from view, it's still there. It is faithful to rise and shine throughout every waking moment of the day (and night), regardless of my ability to see its light or feel its warmth. Too often, I allow my vantage point on earth to dictate how I think about the things I don't see, and as such, I limit myself to the visible, predictable, mediocre. God is none of those things, so why do I allow myself to think that way? Why do I let the immediate overrule the eternal?
The sun still shines even you can't see it. Change your vantage point. See beyond what you can see. Because when you decide to change, everything changes for you.
Just a couple thoughts to share. It had been cloudy all week before we left town last Friday. Not just the few puffy clouds in the sky kind of cloudy, but the "I don't even know if there is still a sun" kind of cloudy. The kind where after a few days, you start to realize that it's affecting your mood rather strongly, especially when you find yourself staring at screen savers of sunsets and the like.
So we got on the plane at 6:25 Friday morning. It's just before dawn, but darker than normal because it's still cloudy. As the plane takes off, I'm watching my 4-year-old peer out the cabin window, enjoying how he gets a kick out of how fast we're going as the trees below shrink into shrubs. It's not long before we're reaching the layer of clouds that have shrouded the Midwest like a dirty blanket all week, and within seconds we're poking out the other side. As we do, I catch the first glimpse of the sun rising in the east.
A simple moment in time, but a small voice inside said, "The sun still shines even when you can't see it." Though hidden from view, it's still there. It is faithful to rise and shine throughout every waking moment of the day (and night), regardless of my ability to see its light or feel its warmth. Too often, I allow my vantage point on earth to dictate how I think about the things I don't see, and as such, I limit myself to the visible, predictable, mediocre. God is none of those things, so why do I allow myself to think that way? Why do I let the immediate overrule the eternal?
The sun still shines even you can't see it. Change your vantage point. See beyond what you can see. Because when you decide to change, everything changes for you.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Fragile not Forgotten
The first week of June, I took a three-day "Wild Hogs" motorcycle trip with Pastor Timmy & two other guys to celebrate Timmy's 40th birthday. Yeah, he's officially a gezer...ha! We rode through the Ozark mountains around Eureka Springs and saw a lot of beautiful scenery. A few weeks before that, I camped out with my dad, brother, and 3-year-old son for two nights at the lake. Both excursions were really fun and refreshing--but in deeper ways than I expected!
While we were out camping, I felt something behind my ear and discovered a tick crawling into my hairline. That got us talking about how amazing and disturbing it is that something so small could possibly give you a life-threatening disease like Lyme's, or like malaria from a mosquito! It reminded me of how incredibly fragile we really are. Sometimes we get so used to being the masters of the universe that our human pride whispers invincibility in our own ears, without our even realizing it. It's a subtle shift from gratitude to self-sufficiency that sets us up for confusion and disappointment. I believe it's healthy for us to remind ourselves how small we really are.
Both nights of camping were crystal clear and beautiful, and most of the motorcycle trip was beautiful too--we did get rained on once, which hurt pretty good! Especially while we were out on the bikes, though, I found myself getting lost in the sheer beauty of it all. The contour of the horizon, the colors of the sun set, the layers of vegetation, even the refreshing chill of the rain. When you really look at it, really take time to do nothing else but look at the world we live in, it's amazing! Every time I do, I can't help but insist that this didn't happen by accident; it couldn't have only been a random occurrence at some point in the past 400 million years or whatever.
Then the pieces came together for me. It was this realization (again) that we have been placed on this planet not just to survive, but to thrive, to enjoy the journey, and to bask in each of the moments we are given. We are small but not insignificant. Fragile but not forgotten. As menial as our individual existence can seem as times, it is not. We are all uniquely shaped, designed, and gifted for a specific niche. What an insight into the heart of God that is! The vastness of His ability and creativity, as well as the beauty of His love. I'm again completely baffled at the depth of His goodness, and inspired to love the life He has entrusted to me!
If you're working like a dog, good for you...just make sure you make time to play like a dog too! We were made to LIVE, baby!
While we were out camping, I felt something behind my ear and discovered a tick crawling into my hairline. That got us talking about how amazing and disturbing it is that something so small could possibly give you a life-threatening disease like Lyme's, or like malaria from a mosquito! It reminded me of how incredibly fragile we really are. Sometimes we get so used to being the masters of the universe that our human pride whispers invincibility in our own ears, without our even realizing it. It's a subtle shift from gratitude to self-sufficiency that sets us up for confusion and disappointment. I believe it's healthy for us to remind ourselves how small we really are.
Both nights of camping were crystal clear and beautiful, and most of the motorcycle trip was beautiful too--we did get rained on once, which hurt pretty good! Especially while we were out on the bikes, though, I found myself getting lost in the sheer beauty of it all. The contour of the horizon, the colors of the sun set, the layers of vegetation, even the refreshing chill of the rain. When you really look at it, really take time to do nothing else but look at the world we live in, it's amazing! Every time I do, I can't help but insist that this didn't happen by accident; it couldn't have only been a random occurrence at some point in the past 400 million years or whatever.
Then the pieces came together for me. It was this realization (again) that we have been placed on this planet not just to survive, but to thrive, to enjoy the journey, and to bask in each of the moments we are given. We are small but not insignificant. Fragile but not forgotten. As menial as our individual existence can seem as times, it is not. We are all uniquely shaped, designed, and gifted for a specific niche. What an insight into the heart of God that is! The vastness of His ability and creativity, as well as the beauty of His love. I'm again completely baffled at the depth of His goodness, and inspired to love the life He has entrusted to me!
If you're working like a dog, good for you...just make sure you make time to play like a dog too! We were made to LIVE, baby!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
The Faith Pendulum
It's amazing how therapeutic good conversation can be (especially when good food is involved too :-) Doing the lunch thing at On the Border the other day, I found myself confessing to one of my good friends how my own heart seems to lead me astray from time to time. One day, I'm resting in the hands of God, and the next, I'm not sure if God is even real. What's up with that!?!
Why is it that one moment, I'm able to live in a state of confident assurance and peaceful resolve that God is with me, sees my problems, and is ultimately in control...but then the smallest little issue can seemingly derail my entire world!? I find myself asking questions like, "Why does this have to happen to me right now?" and thinking things like, "Man! Every time I really get it together, it seems like some crap has to go wrong! If only (blah blah blah), I could really stay on the right track..."
I read something recently that shot me in the heart (or the butt...maybe both). It was along these lines: When something bad/wrong happens to me, I've learned to stop blaming the event, or asking God why. Instead, I take inventory of what that event stirs inside of me--what emotions I feel, what fingers I want to point, what thoughts I think. Because the truth is, that event did not crawl inside of me and plant those things there...they were already there! They were simply brought to the surface by my circumstance.
As much as I hate to admit that some of those God-blaming, doubt-spewing, self-absorbed tendencies are in me, they are. And I don't like it! I find great solace in the fact, though, that although my faith sometimes swings from extreme confidence to extreme doubt, God continues to be uber-gracious, all-forgiving, and ever-able. It again fills me with hope and awe, and boggles my mind that he can use such a "tool" as me!
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." (Heb 13:8) I know I can count on Him...my prayer is that He can count on me too!
Why is it that one moment, I'm able to live in a state of confident assurance and peaceful resolve that God is with me, sees my problems, and is ultimately in control...but then the smallest little issue can seemingly derail my entire world!? I find myself asking questions like, "Why does this have to happen to me right now?" and thinking things like, "Man! Every time I really get it together, it seems like some crap has to go wrong! If only (blah blah blah), I could really stay on the right track..."
I read something recently that shot me in the heart (or the butt...maybe both). It was along these lines: When something bad/wrong happens to me, I've learned to stop blaming the event, or asking God why. Instead, I take inventory of what that event stirs inside of me--what emotions I feel, what fingers I want to point, what thoughts I think. Because the truth is, that event did not crawl inside of me and plant those things there...they were already there! They were simply brought to the surface by my circumstance.
As much as I hate to admit that some of those God-blaming, doubt-spewing, self-absorbed tendencies are in me, they are. And I don't like it! I find great solace in the fact, though, that although my faith sometimes swings from extreme confidence to extreme doubt, God continues to be uber-gracious, all-forgiving, and ever-able. It again fills me with hope and awe, and boggles my mind that he can use such a "tool" as me!
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." (Heb 13:8) I know I can count on Him...my prayer is that He can count on me too!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Ebenezer
For all those who grew up singing hymns in church, you might recall this word from one of the all-time greats. No, it's not the crotchety old man from A Christmas Carol that I'm referring to here (that's who I thought of first too!). It's from the song "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing," and we just sang it for the first time a month or so ago at Mercy Church (the first time ever for me).
Anyhow, there's a line in there that says, "Here I raise my ebenezer, here by Thy great help I've come." I suddenly had a vision of lifting a little Scrooge bobble head toward heaven as I sang those lyrics, and decided at that moment that I had to discover the meaning or else I would burst into laughter when we sang it on Sunday.
So check it out...this is cool. In I Samuel 7, the Israelites are returning to God after serving idols and foreign gods. They go to a place and humble themselves before God with fasting and prayer. Then their arch enemy, the Philistines, decides to come and attack them while they are vulnerable. They cry out to God all the more, and He answers their prayers by "thundering with loud thunder," throwing the Philistines into such a panic that they are defeated by the Israelites. Then the prophet Samuel sets a stone in that place, and names it Ebenezer, meaning "stone of help." Samuel says, "Thus far the Lord has helped us."
I thought that was awesome, mainly because now I could sing the song without laughing! (ha) But I found it very meaningful. I found myself reflecting on all that God has brought me through in my life. Times that I cannot deny His divine assistance in getting through a hard time, providing the means to pay bills that I had no money for, speaking words of comfort when my heart was gripped with fear.
It's those times that I too often forget about when I'm facing a new crisis. Suddenly I'm not quite sure if God's gonna show up and help me get through this, and I start freakin' out 'cause I'm gonna have to go it alone and figure this out for myself! Then I'm more tired and drained than I ought to be, my sleep is not restful, my food doesn't satisfy, and my mind doesn't stop!!
If it sounds like I know what I'm talking about, it's because this summer has been an Ebenezer for me. I'll look back on this summer as a point in my life and in my family where I can say, "Thus far God has helped us." And when we come face to face with the next mountain, I will remember this summer (and all the other times in my life where God was undeniably involved), and I won't allow myself to freak out (hopefully); I won't try to do it on my own. Because I know God is for me, and God is with me.
What are your Ebenezers?
Anyhow, there's a line in there that says, "Here I raise my ebenezer, here by Thy great help I've come." I suddenly had a vision of lifting a little Scrooge bobble head toward heaven as I sang those lyrics, and decided at that moment that I had to discover the meaning or else I would burst into laughter when we sang it on Sunday.
So check it out...this is cool. In I Samuel 7, the Israelites are returning to God after serving idols and foreign gods. They go to a place and humble themselves before God with fasting and prayer. Then their arch enemy, the Philistines, decides to come and attack them while they are vulnerable. They cry out to God all the more, and He answers their prayers by "thundering with loud thunder," throwing the Philistines into such a panic that they are defeated by the Israelites. Then the prophet Samuel sets a stone in that place, and names it Ebenezer, meaning "stone of help." Samuel says, "Thus far the Lord has helped us."
I thought that was awesome, mainly because now I could sing the song without laughing! (ha) But I found it very meaningful. I found myself reflecting on all that God has brought me through in my life. Times that I cannot deny His divine assistance in getting through a hard time, providing the means to pay bills that I had no money for, speaking words of comfort when my heart was gripped with fear.
It's those times that I too often forget about when I'm facing a new crisis. Suddenly I'm not quite sure if God's gonna show up and help me get through this, and I start freakin' out 'cause I'm gonna have to go it alone and figure this out for myself! Then I'm more tired and drained than I ought to be, my sleep is not restful, my food doesn't satisfy, and my mind doesn't stop!!
If it sounds like I know what I'm talking about, it's because this summer has been an Ebenezer for me. I'll look back on this summer as a point in my life and in my family where I can say, "Thus far God has helped us." And when we come face to face with the next mountain, I will remember this summer (and all the other times in my life where God was undeniably involved), and I won't allow myself to freak out (hopefully); I won't try to do it on my own. Because I know God is for me, and God is with me.
What are your Ebenezers?
Thursday, June 19, 2008
How Long is Your Curve?
I never fail to amaze myself at how many times I have to learn the same lesson time and again. I mean, come on, I'm a bonafide MAN, 31 years old, married with children, lifetime Christian, ordained minister, yada, yada, yada...
But if I'm honest, I gots me some issues!
When crunch time comes, I'm way too quick to worry and way too slow to trust in God, thrown into a frantic whirlwind of exhausting thought and random action, none of which proves to be fruitful or helpful. Then lo and behold, something comes out of left field and fills the need that I've been wearing myself out trying to figure out all along. And if I'm honest, I'm both thankful for God's provision yet intensely frustrated that I wasn't the ONE to make it happen!!
Then I realize--I've been here before. I've learned this lesson at another place and time, but somehow temporarily forgot the faithfulness and limitless creativity of God. Then I remember where Jesus said to "seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Simply put, my learning curve's way too long. Once again, I've had to learn to swallow my pride, follow His leading, and rest in the fact that He knows exactly what my needs are, and it's not in His nature to up and leave me...ever!
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (John 6:25-27)
But if I'm honest, I gots me some issues!
When crunch time comes, I'm way too quick to worry and way too slow to trust in God, thrown into a frantic whirlwind of exhausting thought and random action, none of which proves to be fruitful or helpful. Then lo and behold, something comes out of left field and fills the need that I've been wearing myself out trying to figure out all along. And if I'm honest, I'm both thankful for God's provision yet intensely frustrated that I wasn't the ONE to make it happen!!
Then I realize--I've been here before. I've learned this lesson at another place and time, but somehow temporarily forgot the faithfulness and limitless creativity of God. Then I remember where Jesus said to "seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Simply put, my learning curve's way too long. Once again, I've had to learn to swallow my pride, follow His leading, and rest in the fact that He knows exactly what my needs are, and it's not in His nature to up and leave me...ever!
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (John 6:25-27)
Friday, May 16, 2008
Are You Good Enough?
Think of all the crap that's happened to you that you didn't deserve. Granted, sometimes we have to pay the consequences for our mistakes, but what about the stuff that comes out of the blue that just sucks?
Going through spiritual detox the past several years has been painfully delightful for me, and I'm finding more and more freedom in the realization that we live in a fallen world, and in the goodness of God. We don't deserve all the bad stuff, and when we need help, the big man's always there to help us make it through.
Along the path of life, there may come challenges, tragedies, and injustices that we in no way have brought on ourselves. Since sin made its entrance in the Garden of Eden, nothing has been the same. Some stuff just doesn't make sense, and it never will in this life.
I also know that despite my best efforts to be "good," I will either fail miserably or come frustratingly close without ever making it all the way. But here's the kicker: God is infinitely good, and He always makes up for my lack. And the sooner I swallow my pride and accept that truth, the better off I am.
So don't blame God, and don't blame yourself. (unless you really did rob that bank :-) Whatever comes, HIS goodness will get you through to the other side.
Going through spiritual detox the past several years has been painfully delightful for me, and I'm finding more and more freedom in the realization that we live in a fallen world, and in the goodness of God. We don't deserve all the bad stuff, and when we need help, the big man's always there to help us make it through.
Along the path of life, there may come challenges, tragedies, and injustices that we in no way have brought on ourselves. Since sin made its entrance in the Garden of Eden, nothing has been the same. Some stuff just doesn't make sense, and it never will in this life.
I also know that despite my best efforts to be "good," I will either fail miserably or come frustratingly close without ever making it all the way. But here's the kicker: God is infinitely good, and He always makes up for my lack. And the sooner I swallow my pride and accept that truth, the better off I am.
So don't blame God, and don't blame yourself. (unless you really did rob that bank :-) Whatever comes, HIS goodness will get you through to the other side.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Centered
I's just thinkin' about the words to the first song I ever wrote:
"It matters not what people say
It matters not what people may do
For I know, Lord, that you are real
And I know Your word is true
Pressing onward toward the goal
I'll not have to worry, I'll not have to fear
Cuz I'm gonna keep my heart
And I'll keep my mind
Lord I'm gonna keep my life
Centered on You"
I know, I know...not exactly poetry! But after the worship set this Sunday, I felt such awesome peace and comfort inside of myself that I realized again what the key to the good life is all about. And it's all about being "centered" on God, His truth, His purposes, His goodness, His grace...
That's what worship does for me. Helps me get past myself to see how much bigger and better God is than I give Him credit for a lot of the time. Reminds me that it's really not all up to me, no matter how hard I work or how much I try. Paves the way for my worry and fear to be transplanted with faith and hope.
Whatever helps you to center yourself on God, do it...and do it often!
"It matters not what people say
It matters not what people may do
For I know, Lord, that you are real
And I know Your word is true
Pressing onward toward the goal
I'll not have to worry, I'll not have to fear
Cuz I'm gonna keep my heart
And I'll keep my mind
Lord I'm gonna keep my life
Centered on You"
I know, I know...not exactly poetry! But after the worship set this Sunday, I felt such awesome peace and comfort inside of myself that I realized again what the key to the good life is all about. And it's all about being "centered" on God, His truth, His purposes, His goodness, His grace...
That's what worship does for me. Helps me get past myself to see how much bigger and better God is than I give Him credit for a lot of the time. Reminds me that it's really not all up to me, no matter how hard I work or how much I try. Paves the way for my worry and fear to be transplanted with faith and hope.
Whatever helps you to center yourself on God, do it...and do it often!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Life Is Now
I'm busy. Got a lot on my plate. Too much to do and too little time to do it.
Sound familiar? It's easy, even natural, to slide into the stressed-out mode. Ya know, beyond just the busy "good" kind of stress...the place where you're not enjoying life, missing out on the little moments that you'll never get back.
I saw a snapshot of my firstborn son yesterday, and it snapped me back into reality. I was on the verge of tears as I looked at his chubby no-neckness that was a year ago, realizing that he'll never be like that again. Not that I missed out on it; I enjoyed every minute of it, but it made me take inventory of how I'm living now. And if I'm honest, I've been sidetracked when I get home after work, unable to release everything and embrace my family fully.
Yesterday never comes around again. Today is a day like no other. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. So love your life now, and make forever memories everyday.
Sound familiar? It's easy, even natural, to slide into the stressed-out mode. Ya know, beyond just the busy "good" kind of stress...the place where you're not enjoying life, missing out on the little moments that you'll never get back.
I saw a snapshot of my firstborn son yesterday, and it snapped me back into reality. I was on the verge of tears as I looked at his chubby no-neckness that was a year ago, realizing that he'll never be like that again. Not that I missed out on it; I enjoyed every minute of it, but it made me take inventory of how I'm living now. And if I'm honest, I've been sidetracked when I get home after work, unable to release everything and embrace my family fully.
Yesterday never comes around again. Today is a day like no other. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. So love your life now, and make forever memories everyday.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
No More Silent Religion
Here lately I'd had so many conversations with people about spirituality that I'm realizing for myself what much of our generation seems to crave nowadays...the interactive search for truth. For many, just sitting silently listening to an orator leaves them feeling educated but muddled, in need of conversation to process what they've just heard.
For far too long, the various sectors of the church (denominations we call them--some might call them demonizations...ha!) have clinged to their "version" of truth as THE only way to believe, when in fact, I think it was some guy named Jesus who actually said, "I am the way." Anyhow, I know I don't know it all and I never will. In fact, the more I learn, the more I realize how small and dumb I am in fact!
While I believe in absolute truth, I don't believe in absolute process. Meaning that Christ is what is sacred, not how we get to Him. If the path to faith in Christ is meant to look a certain way, I think the Bible would say so. But again, it was Jesus Himself who said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." (John 14:6)
The church talks a lot. I guess my question is: are we listening too? There are many waiting to be heard without being judged, to be allowed to express their faith, doubts, and fears, and to walk their individual pathway to faith in Christ.
For far too long, the various sectors of the church (denominations we call them--some might call them demonizations...ha!) have clinged to their "version" of truth as THE only way to believe, when in fact, I think it was some guy named Jesus who actually said, "I am the way." Anyhow, I know I don't know it all and I never will. In fact, the more I learn, the more I realize how small and dumb I am in fact!
While I believe in absolute truth, I don't believe in absolute process. Meaning that Christ is what is sacred, not how we get to Him. If the path to faith in Christ is meant to look a certain way, I think the Bible would say so. But again, it was Jesus Himself who said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." (John 14:6)
The church talks a lot. I guess my question is: are we listening too? There are many waiting to be heard without being judged, to be allowed to express their faith, doubts, and fears, and to walk their individual pathway to faith in Christ.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Missing It
Being raised in an evangelical church, I was programmed to be an evangelist...meaning that I need to be winning souls for Christ everywhere I go, constantly proclaiming the gospel message, even when people don't want to hear it--and that's where I think it got goofy.
While I believe that the message of Christ brings friction...because grace is totally counter-intuitive...I don't believe that our presentation of that message should create more friction. Somewhere along the line, it seems that a large sector of the church rose up in spiritual pride, proclaiming themselves as the torch bearers of truth, chosen as the ones to bring the light into your darkness, as well as singe you with the flame, just for good measure!
Where did we get the idea that we could jam the truth down people's throats? Where in the Bible are we granted permission to be "God's Goons," shoving people around with shame and guilt when we discover sin (or what we consider sin) in their lives? Who in the world wants to be shunned, judged, and embarrassed? And when did Jesus ever use that approach?
I'm a recovering goon...how 'bout you?
While I believe that the message of Christ brings friction...because grace is totally counter-intuitive...I don't believe that our presentation of that message should create more friction. Somewhere along the line, it seems that a large sector of the church rose up in spiritual pride, proclaiming themselves as the torch bearers of truth, chosen as the ones to bring the light into your darkness, as well as singe you with the flame, just for good measure!
Where did we get the idea that we could jam the truth down people's throats? Where in the Bible are we granted permission to be "God's Goons," shoving people around with shame and guilt when we discover sin (or what we consider sin) in their lives? Who in the world wants to be shunned, judged, and embarrassed? And when did Jesus ever use that approach?
I'm a recovering goon...how 'bout you?
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Trust
The newest addition to our family has been rockin' my faith a little. Baby Sloan's only a month old, but he's already messin' with my head! I don't hold it against him, though; I know it's not intentional! (ha)
But it never fails--every time I hold him to give him a bottle, or some comfort, or just some love (he's got those ultra-chubby extra-kissable cheeks on him), and especially when he's sleeping on my chest--I'm struck by not only the awesome responsibility of parenthood, but by the honest and complete trust that he has in me as his daddy.
Then it hits me...this is how I should be with God. Just as our new baby relies completely upon us as parents to provide and care for him, I should be relying completely on my Abba Father to provide and care for me. After I've done all that I can to the best of my knowledge and ability, I need to step back, breathe, relax, and TRUST completely in God for the results.
How much time do we waste because of worry? I'm determined to waste less, and trust more...
But it never fails--every time I hold him to give him a bottle, or some comfort, or just some love (he's got those ultra-chubby extra-kissable cheeks on him), and especially when he's sleeping on my chest--I'm struck by not only the awesome responsibility of parenthood, but by the honest and complete trust that he has in me as his daddy.
Then it hits me...this is how I should be with God. Just as our new baby relies completely upon us as parents to provide and care for him, I should be relying completely on my Abba Father to provide and care for me. After I've done all that I can to the best of my knowledge and ability, I need to step back, breathe, relax, and TRUST completely in God for the results.
How much time do we waste because of worry? I'm determined to waste less, and trust more...
Monday, March 17, 2008
Who Needs Worship
Ever wonder why most churches reserve a significant portion of their Sunday services for the singing of songs? I've had conversations with several people where that "why" question came up, and there are so many answers...God deserves our worship because He's holy, because He's good, because He's done so much for us, and on and on...but that response seems to fall short for many people.
So I'd like to pose some other questions. Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him?
What I'm hinting at (if you're totally confused right now) is that I think there's something missing inside of us if we're asking "why" worship (and I can say so, cuz I've been missing it before :-). When we truly catch a glimpse of who God really is, the automatic response of our heart is worship. It's automatic, it's irresistible, and it's authentic. If you've not experienced that feeling, then I dare say that you have not yet seen God for who He really is! (by the way, none of us have arrived...it's a never-ending journey!)
But back to my ridiculous questions: Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? NO...we worship God to remind US that He's God, because sometimes we seem to forget. Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? Please! We're the ones with insecurities, and through worship, God affirms us as His beloved! And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him? No--He's "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Heb 13:8)...but He does become "more God" within us the more we get to know Him and understand that He's greater than all of our fears, worries, and struggles.
So WHO needs worship? WE do. God is God whether we worship or not! He truly delights in our worship, but He does not need it. We're the ones who benefit. When we choose to honor Him as God and exalt Him above ourselves, there's an intrinsic realization that we were created for this, that we are loved unconditionally, that we were chosen by Him before we ever knew Him. We remind ourselves that He is God, that we are of incredible value to Him, and that with Him, we can overcome anything.
So I'd like to pose some other questions. Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him?
What I'm hinting at (if you're totally confused right now) is that I think there's something missing inside of us if we're asking "why" worship (and I can say so, cuz I've been missing it before :-). When we truly catch a glimpse of who God really is, the automatic response of our heart is worship. It's automatic, it's irresistible, and it's authentic. If you've not experienced that feeling, then I dare say that you have not yet seen God for who He really is! (by the way, none of us have arrived...it's a never-ending journey!)
But back to my ridiculous questions: Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? NO...we worship God to remind US that He's God, because sometimes we seem to forget. Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? Please! We're the ones with insecurities, and through worship, God affirms us as His beloved! And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him? No--He's "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Heb 13:8)...but He does become "more God" within us the more we get to know Him and understand that He's greater than all of our fears, worries, and struggles.
So WHO needs worship? WE do. God is God whether we worship or not! He truly delights in our worship, but He does not need it. We're the ones who benefit. When we choose to honor Him as God and exalt Him above ourselves, there's an intrinsic realization that we were created for this, that we are loved unconditionally, that we were chosen by Him before we ever knew Him. We remind ourselves that He is God, that we are of incredible value to Him, and that with Him, we can overcome anything.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Christian?
I'll never forget the girl who came up to me in high school and asked, "You remember in 7th grade when you told me I was going to hell?" I think I turned beat red and denied it because I really don't remember it, but honestly I wouldn't be surprised if it was true! I was quite the little "evangelist" at 12 years of age...
The church staff is reading a book together called Un-Christian, and it's been really insightful. It's based on actual research done by the Barna Group that has discovered that people's perception of Christianity has changed quite dramatically in the recent past, say 10 years or so, from being mostly positive to being more on the negative bent.
When I think of how I behaved as a good little church boy growing up, I have to say that I'm not surprised. I was quick to judge (and apparently quick to say so too :-), isolated myself from those who didn't believe like me, and appeared like I had it all together. I wasn't a jerk or anything; everyone who knew me liked me, but overall I feel as though I failed to connect with the culture.
Jesus was a person who lived a perfect life, but didn't broadcast it. He knew the darkness in people's hearts, but didn't judge them. He hung out with the riff-raff of society and could care less whether his reputation suffered for it. He lived every iota of what He taught as a picture of total integrity, leaving no room for hypocrisy.
Have you examined how you come across to outsiders? Are people more or less likely to consider faith in Christ after encountering you?
The church staff is reading a book together called Un-Christian, and it's been really insightful. It's based on actual research done by the Barna Group that has discovered that people's perception of Christianity has changed quite dramatically in the recent past, say 10 years or so, from being mostly positive to being more on the negative bent.
When I think of how I behaved as a good little church boy growing up, I have to say that I'm not surprised. I was quick to judge (and apparently quick to say so too :-), isolated myself from those who didn't believe like me, and appeared like I had it all together. I wasn't a jerk or anything; everyone who knew me liked me, but overall I feel as though I failed to connect with the culture.
Jesus was a person who lived a perfect life, but didn't broadcast it. He knew the darkness in people's hearts, but didn't judge them. He hung out with the riff-raff of society and could care less whether his reputation suffered for it. He lived every iota of what He taught as a picture of total integrity, leaving no room for hypocrisy.
Have you examined how you come across to outsiders? Are people more or less likely to consider faith in Christ after encountering you?
Friday, February 29, 2008
Baby Sloan!!
We're gearing up to head home from the hospital with the newest addition to our family, Sloan Philip Ross Hollis. He arrived on Tuesday, the 26th, at 9 lbs. 14 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long...wow!! He's seriously a little hoss!
Mama is doing well, recovering more quickly from this C-section than the first, so we're thankful for that! She just got done feedin' the little man, and he's napping on her chest with that look of contentment only little babies can pull off.
As soon as Sloan got here, I found myself wondering again at the depth of God's love. Not only has he entrusted each of us with a life, knowing we would inevitably screw some stuff up, but He's also entrusted us with the lives of our children (whether they be biological or adopted), again knowing that we couldn't and wouldn't ever be perfect parents.
I was sitting in the recovery room holding Sloan and waiting for them to roll my wife in after they cleaned her up, and just started crying (again), saying, "God, I don't deserve this...thank You, thank You, thank You." His love transcends everything that we are!
Mama is doing well, recovering more quickly from this C-section than the first, so we're thankful for that! She just got done feedin' the little man, and he's napping on her chest with that look of contentment only little babies can pull off.
As soon as Sloan got here, I found myself wondering again at the depth of God's love. Not only has he entrusted each of us with a life, knowing we would inevitably screw some stuff up, but He's also entrusted us with the lives of our children (whether they be biological or adopted), again knowing that we couldn't and wouldn't ever be perfect parents.
I was sitting in the recovery room holding Sloan and waiting for them to roll my wife in after they cleaned her up, and just started crying (again), saying, "God, I don't deserve this...thank You, thank You, thank You." His love transcends everything that we are!
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