Ebenezer

For all those who grew up singing hymns in church, you might recall this word from one of the all-time greats. No, it's not the crotchety old man from A Christmas Carol that I'm referring to here (that's who I thought of first too!). It's from the song "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing," and we just sang it for the first time a month or so ago at Mercy Church (the first time ever for me).

Anyhow, there's a line in there that says, "Here I raise my ebenezer, here by Thy great help I've come." I suddenly had a vision of lifting a little Scrooge bobble head toward heaven as I sang those lyrics, and decided at that moment that I had to discover the meaning or else I would burst into laughter when we sang it on Sunday.

So check it out...this is cool. In I Samuel 7, the Israelites are returning to God after serving idols and foreign gods. They go to a place and humble themselves before God with fasting and prayer. Then their arch enemy, the Philistines, decides to come and attack them while they are vulnerable. They cry out to God all the more, and He answers their prayers by "thundering with loud thunder," throwing the Philistines into such a panic that they are defeated by the Israelites. Then the prophet Samuel sets a stone in that place, and names it Ebenezer, meaning "stone of help." Samuel says, "Thus far the Lord has helped us."

I thought that was awesome, mainly because now I could sing the song without laughing! (ha) But I found it very meaningful. I found myself reflecting on all that God has brought me through in my life. Times that I cannot deny His divine assistance in getting through a hard time, providing the means to pay bills that I had no money for, speaking words of comfort when my heart was gripped with fear.

It's those times that I too often forget about when I'm facing a new crisis. Suddenly I'm not quite sure if God's gonna show up and help me get through this, and I start freakin' out 'cause I'm gonna have to go it alone and figure this out for myself! Then I'm more tired and drained than I ought to be, my sleep is not restful, my food doesn't satisfy, and my mind doesn't stop!!

If it sounds like I know what I'm talking about, it's because this summer has been an Ebenezer for me. I'll look back on this summer as a point in my life and in my family where I can say, "Thus far God has helped us." And when we come face to face with the next mountain, I will remember this summer (and all the other times in my life where God was undeniably involved), and I won't allow myself to freak out (hopefully); I won't try to do it on my own. Because I know God is for me, and God is with me.

What are your Ebenezers?

How Long is Your Curve?

I never fail to amaze myself at how many times I have to learn the same lesson time and again. I mean, come on, I'm a bonafide MAN, 31 years old, married with children, lifetime Christian, ordained minister, yada, yada, yada...

But if I'm honest, I gots me some issues!

When crunch time comes, I'm way too quick to worry and way too slow to trust in God, thrown into a frantic whirlwind of exhausting thought and random action, none of which proves to be fruitful or helpful. Then lo and behold, something comes out of left field and fills the need that I've been wearing myself out trying to figure out all along. And if I'm honest, I'm both thankful for God's provision yet intensely frustrated that I wasn't the ONE to make it happen!!

Then I realize--I've been here before. I've learned this lesson at another place and time, but somehow temporarily forgot the faithfulness and limitless creativity of God. Then I remember where Jesus said to "seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

Simply put, my learning curve's way too long. Once again, I've had to learn to swallow my pride, follow His leading, and rest in the fact that He knows exactly what my needs are, and it's not in His nature to up and leave me...ever!

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (John 6:25-27)

Are You Good Enough?

Think of all the crap that's happened to you that you didn't deserve. Granted, sometimes we have to pay the consequences for our mistakes, but what about the stuff that comes out of the blue that just sucks?

Going through spiritual detox the past several years has been painfully delightful for me, and I'm finding more and more freedom in the realization that we live in a fallen world, and in the goodness of God. We don't deserve all the bad stuff, and when we need help, the big man's always there to help us make it through.

Along the path of life, there may come challenges, tragedies, and injustices that we in no way have brought on ourselves. Since sin made its entrance in the Garden of Eden, nothing has been the same. Some stuff just doesn't make sense, and it never will in this life.

I also know that despite my best efforts to be "good," I will either fail miserably or come frustratingly close without ever making it all the way. But here's the kicker: God is infinitely good, and He always makes up for my lack. And the sooner I swallow my pride and accept that truth, the better off I am.

So don't blame God, and don't blame yourself. (unless you really did rob that bank :-) Whatever comes, HIS goodness will get you through to the other side.

Centered

I's just thinkin' about the words to the first song I ever wrote:

"It matters not what people say
It matters not what people may do
For I know, Lord, that you are real
And I know Your word is true

Pressing onward toward the goal
I'll not have to worry, I'll not have to fear

Cuz I'm gonna keep my heart
And I'll keep my mind
Lord I'm gonna keep my life
Centered on You"

I know, I know...not exactly poetry! But after the worship set this Sunday, I felt such awesome peace and comfort inside of myself that I realized again what the key to the good life is all about. And it's all about being "centered" on God, His truth, His purposes, His goodness, His grace...

That's what worship does for me. Helps me get past myself to see how much bigger and better God is than I give Him credit for a lot of the time. Reminds me that it's really not all up to me, no matter how hard I work or how much I try. Paves the way for my worry and fear to be transplanted with faith and hope.

Whatever helps you to center yourself on God, do it...and do it often!

Life Is Now

I'm busy. Got a lot on my plate. Too much to do and too little time to do it.

Sound familiar? It's easy, even natural, to slide into the stressed-out mode. Ya know, beyond just the busy "good" kind of stress...the place where you're not enjoying life, missing out on the little moments that you'll never get back.

I saw a snapshot of my firstborn son yesterday, and it snapped me back into reality. I was on the verge of tears as I looked at his chubby no-neckness that was a year ago, realizing that he'll never be like that again. Not that I missed out on it; I enjoyed every minute of it, but it made me take inventory of how I'm living now. And if I'm honest, I've been sidetracked when I get home after work, unable to release everything and embrace my family fully.

Yesterday never comes around again. Today is a day like no other. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. So love your life now, and make forever memories everyday.

No More Silent Religion

Here lately I'd had so many conversations with people about spirituality that I'm realizing for myself what much of our generation seems to crave nowadays...the interactive search for truth. For many, just sitting silently listening to an orator leaves them feeling educated but muddled, in need of conversation to process what they've just heard.

For far too long, the various sectors of the church (denominations we call them--some might call them demonizations...ha!) have clinged to their "version" of truth as THE only way to believe, when in fact, I think it was some guy named Jesus who actually said, "I am the way." Anyhow, I know I don't know it all and I never will. In fact, the more I learn, the more I realize how small and dumb I am in fact!

While I believe in absolute truth, I don't believe in absolute process. Meaning that Christ is what is sacred, not how we get to Him. If the path to faith in Christ is meant to look a certain way, I think the Bible would say so. But again, it was Jesus Himself who said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." (John 14:6)

The church talks a lot. I guess my question is: are we listening too? There are many waiting to be heard without being judged, to be allowed to express their faith, doubts, and fears, and to walk their individual pathway to faith in Christ.

Missing It

Being raised in an evangelical church, I was programmed to be an evangelist...meaning that I need to be winning souls for Christ everywhere I go, constantly proclaiming the gospel message, even when people don't want to hear it--and that's where I think it got goofy.

While I believe that the message of Christ brings friction...because grace is totally counter-intuitive...I don't believe that our presentation of that message should create more friction. Somewhere along the line, it seems that a large sector of the church rose up in spiritual pride, proclaiming themselves as the torch bearers of truth, chosen as the ones to bring the light into your darkness, as well as singe you with the flame, just for good measure!

Where did we get the idea that we could jam the truth down people's throats? Where in the Bible are we granted permission to be "God's Goons," shoving people around with shame and guilt when we discover sin (or what we consider sin) in their lives? Who in the world wants to be shunned, judged, and embarrassed? And when did Jesus ever use that approach?

I'm a recovering goon...how 'bout you?

Trust

The newest addition to our family has been rockin' my faith a little. Baby Sloan's only a month old, but he's already messin' with my head! I don't hold it against him, though; I know it's not intentional! (ha)

But it never fails--every time I hold him to give him a bottle, or some comfort, or just some love (he's got those ultra-chubby extra-kissable cheeks on him), and especially when he's sleeping on my chest--I'm struck by not only the awesome responsibility of parenthood, but by the honest and complete trust that he has in me as his daddy.

Then it hits me...this is how I should be with God. Just as our new baby relies completely upon us as parents to provide and care for him, I should be relying completely on my Abba Father to provide and care for me. After I've done all that I can to the best of my knowledge and ability, I need to step back, breathe, relax, and TRUST completely in God for the results.

How much time do we waste because of worry? I'm determined to waste less, and trust more...

Who Needs Worship

Ever wonder why most churches reserve a significant portion of their Sunday services for the singing of songs? I've had conversations with several people where that "why" question came up, and there are so many answers...God deserves our worship because He's holy, because He's good, because He's done so much for us, and on and on...but that response seems to fall short for many people.

So I'd like to pose some other questions. Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him?

What I'm hinting at (if you're totally confused right now) is that I think there's something missing inside of us if we're asking "why" worship (and I can say so, cuz I've been missing it before :-). When we truly catch a glimpse of who God really is, the automatic response of our heart is worship. It's automatic, it's irresistible, and it's authentic. If you've not experienced that feeling, then I dare say that you have not yet seen God for who He really is! (by the way, none of us have arrived...it's a never-ending journey!)

But back to my ridiculous questions: Do we worship God to remind Him that He's God, because every so often He forgets? NO...we worship God to remind US that He's God, because sometimes we seem to forget. Or maybe God has a subtle inferiority complex and requires that we sing to Him at least once a week to boost His ego a bit? Please! We're the ones with insecurities, and through worship, God affirms us as His beloved! And when we worship God, does He actually become more God than He was before we worshiped Him? No--He's "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Heb 13:8)...but He does become "more God" within us the more we get to know Him and understand that He's greater than all of our fears, worries, and struggles.

So WHO needs worship? WE do. God is God whether we worship or not! He truly delights in our worship, but He does not need it. We're the ones who benefit. When we choose to honor Him as God and exalt Him above ourselves, there's an intrinsic realization that we were created for this, that we are loved unconditionally, that we were chosen by Him before we ever knew Him. We remind ourselves that He is God, that we are of incredible value to Him, and that with Him, we can overcome anything.

Christian?

I'll never forget the girl who came up to me in high school and asked, "You remember in 7th grade when you told me I was going to hell?" I think I turned beat red and denied it because I really don't remember it, but honestly I wouldn't be surprised if it was true! I was quite the little "evangelist" at 12 years of age...

The church staff is reading a book together called Un-Christian, and it's been really insightful. It's based on actual research done by the Barna Group that has discovered that people's perception of Christianity has changed quite dramatically in the recent past, say 10 years or so, from being mostly positive to being more on the negative bent.

When I think of how I behaved as a good little church boy growing up, I have to say that I'm not surprised. I was quick to judge (and apparently quick to say so too :-), isolated myself from those who didn't believe like me, and appeared like I had it all together. I wasn't a jerk or anything; everyone who knew me liked me, but overall I feel as though I failed to connect with the culture.

Jesus was a person who lived a perfect life, but didn't broadcast it. He knew the darkness in people's hearts, but didn't judge them. He hung out with the riff-raff of society and could care less whether his reputation suffered for it. He lived every iota of what He taught as a picture of total integrity, leaving no room for hypocrisy.

Have you examined how you come across to outsiders? Are people more or less likely to consider faith in Christ after encountering you?

Baby Sloan!!

We're gearing up to head home from the hospital with the newest addition to our family, Sloan Philip Ross Hollis. He arrived on Tuesday, the 26th, at 9 lbs. 14 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long...wow!! He's seriously a little hoss!

Mama is doing well, recovering more quickly from this C-section than the first, so we're thankful for that! She just got done feedin' the little man, and he's napping on her chest with that look of contentment only little babies can pull off.

As soon as Sloan got here, I found myself wondering again at the depth of God's love. Not only has he entrusted each of us with a life, knowing we would inevitably screw some stuff up, but He's also entrusted us with the lives of our children (whether they be biological or adopted), again knowing that we couldn't and wouldn't ever be perfect parents.

I was sitting in the recovery room holding Sloan and waiting for them to roll my wife in after they cleaned her up, and just started crying (again), saying, "God, I don't deserve this...thank You, thank You, thank You." His love transcends everything that we are!

Weakness

None of us got it all together. I know I don't! The past few days have been a process of coming to grips with that reality all over again. Not only am I a hopeless sinner without Christ, but I am stricken with innate human weaknesses that I cannot overcome.

I'd like to think that I'm a very organized person...but I'm not. I'd like to think that I'm a great planner...but I'm not. I'd like to think that I produce best when I have total freedom with no guidelines...but I don't. And just last night, I finally realized that that's okay!

God has wired each of us so differently; we think, speak, and act in certain ways. Even if we were all raised by the same parents in the same neighborhood under the same circumstances, we would still be very different in the way we viewed and interacted with the world. Each of us would lead very different lives based on our strengths...and weaknesses...both given to us by God.

That's why I'm okay with it. I believe that I (and everyone else in the world) have been intentionally designed and hand-crafted by God himself. I believe that He put certain dreams within me that I could achieve because He also planted the necessary gifts within in me to make them happen (with His help).

I've decided not to fret or buck up against my weaknesses anymore; they are what they are, and that's why God has given me a wife and friends who are gifted where I'm not. We complete each other (yeah, I know that's a lil' cheesy, but it's true!). In Now, Discover Your Strengths, Marcus Buckingham writes that we should stop trying to "manange our weakesses" and start living our strengths; it's simple, yet profound...and a lot easier, I think!

There is strength in knowing your weaknesses...once you know them, you can accept them and stop worrying about them!

Influence

The power of influence. It's an amazing thing, isn't it? For a person to dramatically affect another person, causing them to consider another avenue of thought, and consequently, a different course of action...I think that's pretty heavy!

I'm an optimist, and a naturally trusting person. But the older I get, the more aware I become of influences that I need to guard myself against in order to avoid getting blind-sided and knocked off track. There's a lot of "smart" people out there with a lot of "good" stuff to say, but without listening with the right filters, they might just "bite" you in the butt.

Think of the power of influence in history...just two names: Adolph Hitler and Martin Luther King. Two visionary leaders, passionate about their beliefs, and skilled in their use of influence. In fact, they changed the world they lived in because they used their influence effectively!

I used to think that being famous would be powerful and cool; I'm not so sure now, and it really doesn't matter. I'm just determined to use whatever level of influence God entrusts to me for purposes that are right, noble, and just. It's wild to think that God set it up like this; instead of just programming us all to think the right way, he put us in this pinball machine to bounce around and rub shoulders with all sorts of people, gleaning helpful wisdom and sifting out the meaningless.

Who's influencing you...and who are you influencing?

The Worship Staircase

Growing up in a Pentecostal church, I was accustomed to very demonstrative expressions of worship. Pretty much everything was acceptable, from singing and clapping to dancing and shouting. We were labelled as weird or "holy rollers" by some (which I understand), but that's the frame of reference that I come from.

Though I don't remember this being taught from the pulpit, I grew up thinking that there were levels to worship...like an ascending staircase. The entry level was singing, where you joined the congregation during song service. Then the next step was clapping, followed by the raising of hands. The top of the staircase, the absolute pinnacle of bringing praise to God, was dancing. If you danced, you were like a professional worshiper!

Since I never danced (I was never brave enough, plus I'm a terrible dancer), I felt like I was lacking something...as if God was somewhat pleased with my singing and lifting of hands, but He was really hoping that I'd follow the example of those dancing nearby.

I've come up with my own levels, or stairs, of worship. They're not out of a book or anything, just the way I understand it. I now believe that the entry level of worship is an appreciation for God's creation...the vastness, beauty and complexity of the world we live in (I love stuff like "Planet Earth" on Discovery Channel). I think the next step is a sense of gratitude for the life that God has given us. To recognize that God entrusted this one life to each of us, knowing that we're imperfect and would mess some stuff up, but also knowing that we couldn't live a happy life unless we could choose for ourselves...that's a deep kind of love!

The next level of worship would be to take notice of God's gift of redemption to us in Jesus. He entrusted this life to us, and because we're imperfect, He made a way for us to make the wrongs right...by accepting the sacrifice of Jesus at the cross. Then comes the highest level of worship, which is not the top of the staircase, but rather a new set of stairs that we never finish climbing. To access this staircase, we must go beyond acknowledgment of God's gifts to us--the world, our lives, His own Son--and enter into a relationship with Him. Now we worship God for more than what He's done...we worship Him for who He is.

This highest level never ends, because we can never fully comprehend all of who God is. The more we get to know Him, the more reason we have to worship Him. I think that this is the truest form of worship...to worship God not just for what He's done for us, but for who He is!

GOD/DOG

I read through Ephesians with a friend this week, and we talked it over together last night. It was cool! It's really insightful to hear other's perspectives on biblical truths--how they read it, process it, and what it means to their life. We all glean something different because we are so different!

Anyhow, I'm not sure if we were talking about the second chapter where it talks about "His great love with which He loved us" (vs. 4) or towards the end of the book where we're instructed to "walk in love" (5:2), but something about God's love prompted my friend to share this little tidbit with me.

He said that when he thinks about GOD, often he'll think about a DOG. After I jumped aside to make room for the imminent bolt of lightning that would snuff out his existence (ha!), I asked the only logical question: "Why?!" His answer was awesome.

No matter how you mistreat a dog, it always loves you. Even when you ignore it and act like it doesn't exist, it still meets you at the door with tail wagging and eyes begging for affection. It is thrilled to see you and be with you, regardless of how you feel towards it. When all your other friends are nowhere to be found, you can count on that one friend--your dog.

When he put it that way, I had to agree wholeheartedly! How true it is. I think the main difference is that God's already housebroken (hardy-har-har!)...but that's one analogy that'll stick with me. Sometimes I get so fed up with myself that I think God's fed up too, but when I just come to Him, I find that He always takes me just as I am.

Maybe there's a reason that GOD and DOG are made of the same letters?

Everyday Worship

I find great comfort in the fact that we can engage in worship anywhere at anytime. Growing up in church I had the notion that real worship only happened on Sundays and Wednesdays when we came together to sing songs and have a service. But if that was true, how could we live out a Christian life in worship of God without looking like an idiot? (singing & clapping as we go throughout our day, kneeling in the middle of the office by the water cooler...what?)

Worship is everything we do...done to the glory of God. When we give our best effort at work because we recognize that God provided us with that opportunity to provide for our family, that's worship. When we eat healthy and work up a sweat at the gym because we're thankful for the body that God entrusted to our care, that's worship. When we love our kids and give them the time of day even when we don't feel like it because we know that God's never too busy for us, that's worship.

I'm all for corporate worship...I mean, I love it! (good thing since I'm a music pastor--ha!) But if that's the only avenue of worship that we engage in on a weekly basis, we're missing it BIG TIME! Our everyday life is meant to be lived out in worship...from work to play to church to marriage to talking, eating, drinking and laughing.

Thank God that He doesn't live only in the church, nor does He only take notice of our lives when we're singing songs about Him. Truth is He's interested in every facet of our being; after all, He made us who we are anyhow! I think He's overjoyed when we reciprocate that interest by seeking to live out the life He gave to us in perpetual worship of Him. All it takes is a decision on our part to do so!

Holy Love

Driving home on the highway the other day, I suddenly found myself thinking about my wife...specifically about how I've been loving her lately. I started replaying recent scenarios in my head where she asked me to do something, and I did it, but if I'm honest, I had a pretty sorry attitude about it! If she could've heard the unspoken phrases inside my head, it woulda been on like Donkey Kong!!

Anyhow, for some reason that passage from Ephesians came trickling into my cranial cavity: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her." (Eph 5:25) I started thinking about what that meant--to love my wife "just as Christ also loved the church."

Christ loved the church SO much that He gave His life for it; He died for all people, in the hope that they would put their faith in Him as Lord and Savior. BUT here's the kicker: He did it without any promise or guarantee that ANYONE would ever put their faith in Him. He went to the cross willingly out of love for us knowing inside of Himself that it might not be accepted by any. That is a love that I do not possess or understand, but I want to.

The word "holy" has come to mean something more to me in the last few months. I used to think that it meant "exceptionally good, better than the rest," and that somehow I could achieve more holiness in my life by living well (following the rules, doing what I know I should, etc.). But I think there's a lot more to holiness than that. When we say God is holy, I think it means that He is altogether otherly; everything about Him is on a different plane, a higher dimension, a level of purity and goodness that we can never fully comprehend in this life.

So as I drove that day, I started to ask God to help me love with the holy love that He has already shown us. The kind of love that doesn't act out of any kind of selfish ambition, but simply seeks to love because I want to...because I love my wife, and I want her to know it everyday. And when I reach the end of my life and stand before God, if I can be proud of nothing else, I want to stand there in humble and reverent pride knowing that I loved my wife "just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her."

Have you taken a love inventory lately?